Zarbon's Childhood Saga
by Karatelover
Summary: In this collection of stories, you get to find out what Zarbon was like as a child, his relashionship with his 'adoptive father' the evil and powerful Emperor Frieza, his lost admiration for 'uncle' Cooler, meet his trainer the evil and cold Shasha 'OC' and his childhood playmate Liya 'OC', plus his idiotic babysitters Appule and Cui! Did we mention his rivalry with Dodoria?
1. Chapter 1

_Zarbon, Heir to the Empire of Freezer_

Once upon a time, a long time ago on Planet Freezer in the earth year of 1963, around the time the Vietnam War started on Planet Earth, there was a lovely young lad named Zarbon Natasha Mustashi, as of why he had a girl's middle name, who cares!

Anyways he was dropped off on planet Freezer by his mother to the care of Freezer, she died shortly afterwards. So Freezer took responsibility and decided to raise little Zarbon as his own, he was not too pleased with it, but he tolerated it.

Anyways a couple of years after Zarbon's mom "dropped him off", Zarbon was officially now the legally adopted son of Freezer with an exception, and he had to be his slave too. The whole task of me to explain what happened will happen right now.

There was supposed to be an opening ceremony to present the little tike as the heir to Freezer's empire, a title that when his father King Cold retired, was passed onto Freezer. It would also be the first time that Freezer presented Zarbon publicly, rumors started that Freezer adopted a child of a different species, although the planet had mostly changelings, the largest minority on Planet Freezer were in fact Zarbon's species, aka primal changelings.

Kiwi was an old friend of Zarbon's dad and his mother, and he liked Zarbon as a friend. He dreamed of being a top henchman for Freezer, but that would not happen anytime soon, he could not be fully trusted, so in order to prove this Freezer made Kiwi the official babysitter for prince Zarbon so he could not bother Freezer when he was busy.

That day Zarbon wired himself up, had excessively too much caffeine and was running around the room without being exhausted. Kiwi made a horrible effort to calm him down, it did no good, "Come on Zarbon, we have to get you ready for the ceremony!" Kiwi said.

"Why Kiwi, I want to play!" Zarbon said.

"We don't have time to play games; you're so hyper you need to calm down! Does anyone have a tranquilizer?" Kiwi asked.

"Come and find me Kiwi!" Zarbon ran out of the bedroom and down the hallway.

"Zarbon get back here now!" Kiwi said running after Zarbon. Funny how Zarbon could outrun Kiwi, "Zarbon get back here!" Kiwi yelled.

"Come on Kiwi I bet that you can't catch me! You can't catch me! You can't catch me!" all the sudden little Zarbon bumped into Freezer, he looked up at him bewildered. "Hello Freezer!" he said.

"Hello Zarbon." Freezer said.

There was a huge problem with Freezer, in fact he was extremely evil, cruel and a ruthless tyrant. Whenever someone did not agree with him, he had them executed, and he liked to make people suffer and laugh at their suffering.

He owned not only a bunch of palaces, but planets too; sometimes he sold them to aliens, only to kill those aliens later to regain territory. Little Zarbon did not yet know what Freezer was capable of; he adored him, but later in life would come to despise him.

"Sorry lord Freezer!" Zarbon said.

"That's okay Zarbon, now get ready for the ceremony, and give me a big favor stay out of my way until the ceremony!" Freezer said.

"Yes lord Freezer!" Zarbon said running over to Kiwi who had caught up with him.

"Why did you run away like that, I'm getting too old to chase you," Kiwi said.

"I thought we were playing a game." Zarbon said. While Kiwi and Zarbon walked back to the bedroom, Freezer stared at them with hatred in his eyes.

There were a bunch of people outside the palace, the trumpets sounded, and Freezer along with Cooler, Kiwi, and King Cold came out onto the balcony.

"Ladies and gentlemen we present to you the rulers of Planet Freezer!" Kiwi announced everyone cheered, for the fear that they would be killed.

"Now I will direct my and everyone's attention to the Emperor Freezer!" King Cold said.

"Hello everyone!" Freezer said, everyone cheered with fear, "Lend me your heads and torsos!" Freezer said laughing everyone else was silent.

"Enough of the dark lame humor Freezer, you're so funny that it puts me to sleep." Cooler said.

"Let me do my job Cooler, anyways I have an announcement to make, I will not be around forever. Someone will continue to rule my empire!" Freezer then picked Zarbon up and held him up to the crowd, "Listen everyone this will be the new lord of the universe and your new emperor when I die! His name is Zarbon!" Freezer yelled.

The crowd cheered and poor Zarbon was so scared that Freezer would drop him, "Put me down, put me down, don't drop me!" Zarbon yelled.

Freezer put Zarbon down, "One day Zarbon, this will all be yours, when I die you'll be the new emperor." Freezer said.

"This will be mine?" asked Zarbon.

"Everything." Freezer said.

"Wow cool." Zarbon said.

"That is all we want to say, all of you return to your homes or else I'll have you all hanged!" Freezer yelled. Everyone went running, Freezer laughed, "That got the crowd to move hum Cooler?" asked Freezer still laughing.

"Freezer you're silly." Cooler said laughing.

"Good now Kiwi take Zarbon back to his room and get him ready for dinner, well shall celebrate!" Freezer said.

"But there is nothing really to celebrate about." Cooler said.

"Sure there is, we're going to celebrate the thought of Zarbon being the heir to my empire!" Freezer said as they all went back into the palace.

They were all in the dining room in the evening, they were all sitting at a table, "I love to throw parties, don't you like it when I throw parties Dodoria?" asked Freezer.

"Of course Lord Freezer, after all I like to eat cake." Dodoria said chuckling.

"But Dodoria, you should really watch what you eat, after all you suffered two heart attacks and a stroke." Freezer said.

"I know and I'm in my early forties." Dodoria said.

"Me, well I'm happy to say that I'm in my early 200s. Now I shall propose a toast." Freezer then stood up, "Attention everyone, I would like to make a toast to the future emperor of my empire! Zarbon! May he rule with tyranny as much I did!" Freezer said.

Zarbon then smiled and blushed, "When I become emperor of the universe, I want to give everyone stuffed animals to play with and then give the poor money so they can buy stuff!" Zarbon said.

Everyone laughed, Freezer blushed, "Well how very interesting, I hope to God that you don't do any of that stuff!" Freezer said.

"But Freezer we're rich, and they have nothing!" Zarbon said.

"Well who thought him to be so compassionate?" asked Freezer, Kiwi whistled suspiciously, "Now Zarbon I'll have to really harden you up, tomorrow I want him to see his first execution!" Freezer said.

"But Freezer, he's a little boy, are you sure it's appropriate to show him such violence at such a young age? I didn't show my children executions until they were at least ten years old." Cooler said.

"Trust me on this one Cooler, the more violence he's exposed to, the more he'll want to kill." Freezer said.

"You're so sick, that's why my father favors you over me, but I'm no better. I look forward to watching the execution with you." Cooler said.

"So be it tomorrow Zarbon will watch his first execution!" Freezer then raised his glass, "Cheers to me!" he said. He laughed evilly and took a sip while Zarbon just smiled naively at him.

The next day, Freezer, Cooler, Kiwi and Zarbon were in the auditorium in the middle of the desert. They saw a young girl taken to the block, where the executioner waited. "How old is that girl Freezer?" asked Zarbon.

"She's about your age." Freezer said.

"What's going to happen to her?" asked Zarbon.

"She's going to die for a crime that she committed." Freezer said.

"She's going to jail right?" asked Zarbon.

"No Zarbon, she's going to die like your mother died!" Freezer said.

"What did she do anyways?" asked Cooler.

"She stole from a market place, sure in Persia and Arabia they'll cut off your hand, but not here. Here people will have to die." Freezer said.

Freezer gave the signal; the executioner raised his sword up and sliced the girl's head off. There was blood everywhere, Freezer laughed along with Cooler, "Good now that she's dead, we can go home!" Freezer said.

Zarbon looked in terror as he looked at the executioner picking up the severed head of the girl and putting it on a stake, "Oh no you killed her!" he then started crying.

"What's wrong Zarbon?" asked Kiwi.

"Freezer killed a girl that was my same age; I could have used her as a playmate!" Zarbon said.

"Well it's too late for that! Let's go home!" Freezer said.

That evening in the dining hall everyone was there, "So how did the little brat enjoy the execution?" asked Dodoria.

"He didn't like it." Freezer said.

"I wonder why?" asked Dodoria.

"Hey Zarbon, you didn't touch your food, what's wrong with you?" asked Cooler.

"Nothing uncle Cooler," Zarbon said.

"Well you better eat before I kill you!" Freezer yelled.

"I don't see why that girl had to die!" Zarbon yelled getting up and running out of the dining room.

"Oh now you've done it Freezer." Cooler said.

"So what, it's not like he's that seriously hurt." Freezer said.

"I'll go check on him." Kiwi said getting up and leaving the dining room.

Meanwhile in his room, Zarbon cried his eyes out on his bed.

Kiwi came into his room, "What's wrong Zarbon?" he asked.

"Why did Freezer have that girl killed?" asked Zarbon.

"That's nothing, he's killed more people then you can imagine he's killed men, women and children unfortunately. That's just the way Freezer is, he's horrible. He doesn't care if people die, as long as they suffer for their crimes. I swear that on my Yiddish ancestors, that is if I had any, that I won't let him hurt you." Kiwi said.

"That's not fair!" Zarbon said.

"I know it isn't fair, but Freezer is the emperor and that is the way it goes." Kiwi said.

"That poor girl was just trying to get food, because there is so much starving on this planet, just like you told me!" Zarbon said.

"I know the poverty rate is really high, but people die everyday, there is nothing that we can do about it." Kiwi said.

"I wish I could help them out." Zarbon said.

"Don't you'll make Freezer mad, don't ever anger Freezer, he might not let you off the hook next time. I'm not telling you this to be cruel; I'm just worried about you." Kiwi said.

Everyone else left the dining room, "Well good night Freezer." Cooler said.

"Goodnight Cooler." Freezer said walking away.

Freezer went into his bedroom and shut the door, Freezer had another dark secret that Zarbon would shortly find out about, which he didn't even tell a lot of his low level solders and did not get out for a long time until the day he died.

Freezer was on the phone calling the dungeon, "Yes I would like to have sex with a slave delivered to me, pronto!' Freezer said hanging up the phone.

A few minutes later there was a six-year-old changeling boy in chains naked standing in front of Freezer naked, "Well well Adam, we meet again." Freezer said smiling sleazy.

Poor Adam gulped, "Where do you want it lord Freezer?" he asked.

"I'll tell you, come in don't be shy." Freezer said, the frightened boy came into the room and Freezer shut the door.

Yes it was true that Freezer was not only a sexual predator but also like to pray on little boys and girls sexually. It was no wonder why no man or woman would have wanted him.

Later that night when the changeling boy was asleep in Freezer's bed Freezer had a nightmare and woke up from it. Next day Freezer was in the throne room with Cooler, "Cooler can you keep a secret? I had a dream that I had sex with Zarbon." Freezer said.

"That is gross, nobody needs to know that! Isn't it bad enough that you love to have sex with children, especially when you're depressed and want to take your unhappiness out on someone?" asked Cooler.

"I can't help it, I used to have a friend who used to sleep with his daughter, then she got pregnant and then shot herself with a laser gun, but that won't happen to Zarbon." Freezer said.

"Now Freezer, just because you're an evil emperor doesn't mean that you should have the right to take advantage of Zarbon like that!" Cooler said.

"Yah I must keep my lusty, beast nature under control, but he's so handsome and little, it's no wonder why I'm miserable, I'm handsome and little too." Freezer said.

Cooler laughed, "What's so funny?" asked Freezer.

"You're little but not handsome as maw." Cooler said.

Meanwhile in the big garden Zarbon ran around smelling the roses and Kiwi was with him, "Kiwi aren't the flowers beautiful?" asked Zarbon.

"They're called roses, they can be red, white, pink and all sorts of other colors." Kiwi said.

"I love roses," Zarbon said.

"A lot of people do, the red ones mean love, and the white ones mean pure you know like me." Kiwi said. Of course, Kiwi was not very pure at all; he was kind of a negative person if anything.

"I wish they could live forever." Zarbon said still sad about seeing that girl executed.

"Nobody lives forever Zarbon; even Freezer will die one day." Kiwi said.

"Oh he barely pays any attention to me." Zarbon said.

"He's mean I know I wish he could die too." Kiwi said.

"Do you think I'll ever get married someday Kiwi?" asked Zarbon.

"You know the rules." Kiwi said.

"I will find a bride when Freezer dies, which could be in two years or more, until then I must stay pure." Zarbon said rolling his eyes.

"You got that right!" Kiwi said.

Later that night, Zarbon was dreaming that he was in some jungle and there was an attractive woman in front of him with brown skin and thick, long, black hair, "Zarbon come and get me!" Serena said jumping into the river, it turns out that the woman was his mother and she looked quite young too.

"I'm coming mother!" Zarbon said diving into the river too, looked for her under water, but no sign of her so far, he came up for air and saw that she was in a tree. He waved to her, she waved back, then all the sudden the executioner that cut the girl's head off from real life was behind his mother, and he cut her head off.

Zarbon woke up screaming, "Freezer!" he got out of bed and ran to Freezer's room.

Freezer was in bed thinking to himself, "Don't do it Freezer, you'll gain an even worst reputation! No I will do it, I'm evil anyways, so why the fuck should I care?"

Freezer then said aloud, "Whoever controls the sky give me a sign that I should fuck Zarbon!" All the sudden Zarbon ran into Freezer's room all scared, "Zarbon what's wrong?" he asked.

"I had a nightmare!" he ran into Freezer's arms crying.

Freezer hugged him, and then started rubbing him sexually, "Now, now Zarbon get into my bed." He said.

Zarbon climbed into bed with Freezer, "Oh Freezer I'm so happy that I can sleep with you." Zarbon said.

Freezer started to take Zarbon's pajama bottoms off, "Now Zarbon we're going to play a game, God you're such a handsome little boy, you remind me of myself when I was younger." Freezer said.

Zarbon of course was confused, "What kind of game?" he asked.

Freezer took his own pajama bottoms off, "You'll see it'll make you feel better." He said. He then held Zarbon down.

"What are you doing Freezer?" asked Zarbon.

"Trust me this will hurt just a little bit at first!" Freezer said, throwing the covers over their bodies.

"Let me go Freezer!" Zarbon said.

"No I won't!" Freezer yelled. He started raping Zarbon; I am not going to go into details for this is far too sick to talk about so I will go to the next day.

The next day Kiwi went into Zarbon's room he saw that Zarbon looked sad and sulked, "Zarbon what's wrong, you look so sad?" asked Kiwi.

"Freezer hurt me." Zarbon said in a depressed voice, which was not the voice he usually spoke to Kiwi with.

"What did he do?" Kiwi asked.

"I'm not sure, but my butt hole hurts a whole lot." Zarbon said.

"I know you're so young and all but what did he do to you?" asked Kiwi.

"I don't know we were playing this game he said." Zarbon said.

"What kind of game?" asked Kiwi.

"He stuck his penis in my butt hole, it hurt too, I've been sore all morning!" Zarbon then started crying.

"He did what?" Kiwi asked with a shocked look on his face, and then he crashed to the ground and started crying hard.

"What's wrong Kiwi?" asked Zarbon.

"Freezer ordered me to protect you, now I realize that I need to protect you from him, but I can't just beat him up, he'll kill me! I don't want to die!" Kiwi said.

"Don't cry Kiwi!" Zarbon said hugging the coward that was too chicken to stand up to Freezer.

"You don't understand kid, I know you're too young but Freezer raped you! It's morally wrong to have sex with a kid such as yourself! He took your innocence away!" Kiwi said.

"Oh no I'm no longer a kid!" Zarbon said.

"Yes you are you just were violated is all." Kiwi said. They both hugged each other, one hoping the comfort the other.

Freezer was in the throne room with Cooler and laughing hard, "What is so amusingly funny Freezer?" asked Cooler.

"I raped Zarbon, I actually raped him!" Freezer said laughing.

"Oh my God you've gone off the loony bin! Do you have any idea what would happen if anyone else would hear about this?" asked Cooler.

"No and I don't care!" Freezer said.

"You are a sick pervert! You tried to have sex with my daughters and your cousins, but this time you've gone too far!" Cooler said.

"Hell the Roman emperors used to have sex with little kids what's the big deal and I believe that one of them had sex with his dead sister too!" Freezer said laughing so hard that he fell off the thrown.

"So how was it?" asked Cooler.

"It was so good! Zarbon was so squirmy and he was terrified too, it was so great to see someone smaller than me cower with fear!" Freezer said giggling.

Cooler frowned, "I was being sarcastic Freezer!" Cooler got off the thrown, went out of the throne room and did not see Freezer for the rest of the day.

Zarbon and Kiwi were in the rainforest feeding the animals, "It's ok I won't hurt you." Zarbon said holding some grass in his hand.

A baby deer ran up to Zarbon and ate the grass, "I'm so glad that you love animals, I like animals too. It's too bad that Freezer hates them, he's so insensitive to their feelings." Kiwi said.

"Animals have feelings?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes, everything on this planet has feelings Zarbon that is what is so beautiful about nature, you look at it and wonder what it is feeling." Kiwi said.

"Yah." Zarbon said petting the deer on the head.

Kiwi started crying again, "Why did you do that Freezer! Why, kid you don't realize how much pain Freezer has caused me!" Kiwi said.

"I'm sorry for your troubles." Zarbon said.

"I'm lucky to have a friend like you, I don't any friends!" Kiwi said breaking down and crying.

"Me too Kiwi!" Zarbon said hugging Kiwi again.

Freezer hid in the bushes, "Soon Zarbon, you'll be evil like me, whether you like it or not." He thought to himself.

From that day on Freezer promised on his Yiddish ancestors, that is if he had any, that he would make Zarbon the most evil person alive, which failed miserably.

End of Story


	2. Chapter 2

_A Friend Called Apple_

At some broken down restraint in the projects on Planet Freezer, was an alien that worked for his family's restraint, his name was Apple. He almost looks like the aliens off the movie "Alien", only he's not scary looking at all. He looked out the window, hearing some couple shouting and a gunshot going off, he jumped, he needed to get out of the projects, it was no place for a classy person like him.

He went up to his mother, after closing the restaurant down for the night, "Mother I need to do something with my life, I'm eighteen years old and I can't be washing dishes forever." Apple said.

She smiled and hugged him, "Well Apple I suggest that you look in the newspaper." She said.

Apple got the newspaper from today out and started looking at it, "Let's see now, there is a job opening for an architect for building another palace for Freezer." Apple said.

Apple's mother shook her head at him, "Oh Apple you know nothing about architecture, and you haven't even finished high school, look for something else." She said.

Apple looked again and he came across a certain want aid, which he perhaps qualified for, "Oh look mother, they need a babysitter for the heir to Freezer's empire!" said Apple excited.

"You mean prince Zarbon? I'm warning you he's a little kid, he's about five years old at least, but I think that would be a nice challenge for you, after all you like kids." She said.

Apple then took off his apron and turned the dishwasher on, "This kid better not be a little brat, I'll go make a living for once! I could live in luxury, I'll go do that interview right now!" he then started heading for the door.

"Wait Apple!" his mother ran after him and hugged him, "Be careful!" she said.

"I'll be fine; if I can I will send you some money." He said, with that, he was off.

That same night, it took about an hour to get to the palace, Apple walked up to the palace after he got off the bus, he gulped, "Here goes nothing" he walked up to the guards, "Hello I'm here for an interview with Freezer." Apple said.

A guard looked at him, "Did you get an appointment?" he asked.

"Yes I called an hour ago, he is expecting me." Apple said.

"All right go on in." the guard said.

"Thanks." Apple said as he went on in.

Next thing you know, Apple was in the room waiting for Freezer to come in, he thought for a while, "Boy I sure am nervous, I heard that Freezer is a ruthless tyrant."

All the sudden the tyrant came into the room, "Hello you must be Apple! I'm the emperor Freezer!" said Freezer.

Apple looked at Freezer's stature, while Apple was only 5'4 feet tall, Freezer was of short statue, even shorter then Napoleon. "Wow you're even shorter in person." He said.

"Yes I know, I'm about 4'7, I get it from my mother's side of the family, my mother was a prostitute, and I was born out of wedlock." Freezer said.

Apple's eyes grew wide, "Wow I never even knew that." He said.

Freezer sat down in the chair, "So where are you from?" he asked.

"I'm from the projects in Downtown Freezer! I'm very pleased to make your acquaintance." Apple said.

"Charmed, anyways lets' quit fucking off and get to the bottom of this." Freezer said looking at a clipboard with a piece of paper on it.

Apple was surprised, he expected Freezer to be more eloquent with his words, he did not sound like he imagined, and he did not imagine him cussing, "In my house we don't usually cuss." Apple said.

Freezer looked up from the clipboard with angry red eyes, "This is a palace, and I'm the master of cussing here. Anyways first question, why do you want to work here?" asked Freezer.

"I want to do something with my life, so why not start babysitting!" said Apple.

"Ok then next question, do you like kids?" asked Freezer sounding board.

"Yes, I used to babysit for my cousin." Apple said.

Freezer then rolled his eyes, "Ok, now are you ready to handle a big responsibility or not?" he asked sternly.

"Yes I am!" said Apple enthusiastically.

Freezer then smiled, fuck the other people who wanted to sign up for this important job, "Good welcome to the team!" yelled Freezer throwing the clipboard to the side, he then shook Apple's hand.

"Thank you I'm very delighted sir!" he said happily.

"Oh please don't act so charming anymore you're grossing me out! Now I want to introduce you to Zarbon, follow me please!" with that the much shorter Freezer walked out of the room with the taller Apple following him.

They went to the main thrown room, in there was Kiwi, Zarbon's other babysitter who was at least, well if I were to guess in his early forties, maybe. Cooler, Freezer's better-looking older brother was in the throne room too, he was filing his nails, then there was little Zarbon, he was five years old and dressed up in a karate suit.

Freezer then said to Apple, "First I want to introduce you to Kiwi, my assistant in charge of foreign affairs, also Zarbon's other babysitter." Freezer said.

Kiwi was not too bright and he was chewing on a cigar, he then grabbed Apple's hand and shook it, "Nice to meet you, I'm so glad that I'm not going to be the only one too look after Zarbon anymore!" he said.

"Cool." Apple said not knowing what to think about Kiwi's thickness.

"This is my older brother Cooler." Freezer said.

"Half brother actually, nice to meet you Said Cooler shaking his hand.

"Thank you for your hospitality." Apple said.

"Last but not least, I want you to meet Zarbon. Zarbon where are you?" asked Freezer.

All the sudden something jumped on Freezer's back and shocked him, it was none other than little Zarbon, "Here I am Freezer!" he yelled.

Freezer was in pain, "Zarbon right now Freezer's back is hurting him ok?" he took Zarbon off of his back, "This is Apple he will be your other babysitter." Freezer said.

"Hello I'm Zarbon, your head is shaped funny." Zarbon said.

"Yes it is isn't it? I noticed that you have green hair." Apple said. Everyone started laughing gaily as ever, "So how long has he lived here?" asked Apple.

Freezer then scratched his head, "He's lived here since he was only three years old? Well his mother died of anorexia, or was it heart failure?" Freezer's memory was usually good, but in this case, it is as if he did not want to remember anything. All the sudden he turned red and got pissed off, "Damn it, I only cried because I never got to have sex with her!"

Cooler then laughed, "I knew you didn't show any remorse for her death, you only wanted to have sex with her!" said Cooler pointing at Freezer.

Apple was shocked, how someone could be so cruel and tactless, "Now what kind of a thing is that to say around a little kid?" he asked. After all, he was raised in a nice conservative family even though they were poor.

Cooler then shrugged his shoulders, "In this palace we're pretty much topsy turvy!" he then laughed it off.

Apple then decided to change the subject, "Now what?" he asked.

Cooler then got off his throne, wow what a graceful looking changeling, quite handsome for a changeling compared to his younger brother, and so tall, "We'll leave you alone so you can get to know Zarbon." Then he snapped his fingers and he, Freezer and Kiwi left the room.

Apple then looked at the little Zarbon, wow so this was the actual heir to the throne, he did not think that he would be a different species then Freezer, but they did say that the emperor Freezer adopted the heir, oh well; it is not like the news and propaganda that Freezer put out was that important to him. "Ok now Zarbon, tell me what you know about yourself." said Apple.

"Someday when Freezer dies, I'm going to be ruler of the universe!" said Zarbon.

Apple then rolled his eyes this was an very big responsibility, "Oh really? I knew Freezer was arrogant, but this is going off the wall." Apple thought, especially since he knew almost nothing about Freezer.

Zarbon got a chocolate bar out and broke it in half, "Want a bite?" he asked offering Apple the other half.

Apple smiled, "No thanks, chocolate makes me gassy." He said.

"All right in the mean time I'll just eat this up!" said Zarbon he put both pieces into his mouth and chewed them up.

"You need to lose some weight, you don't want to be obese do you?" asked Apple.

"Don't worry I'm supposed to be getting a new trainer soon." Zarbon said.

"So I see." Apple said.

"I like to run around the palace and the gardens, Freezer said it was good exercise! He usually tells me to do it when he wants me to leave him alone!" yelled Zarbon who started running in circles around Apple.

Apple was confused, "Yes it most certainly is." He said.

All the sudden Freezer came back into the throne room, "Ok Zarbon its time for bed," said Freezer. Then he started feeling Zarbon weirdly, this of course shocked Apple.

"Why are you touching him like that?" asked Apple freaked out.

"What are you talking about?" asked Freezer as if nothing happened.

"Oh nothing, maybe it was my imagination!" said Apple, who did not usually think of such perverted images.

Freezer got defensive all the sudden, "Don't question me again or else I'll kill you!" he yelled.

Apple started to laugh, "That's really funny!" he said taking it as a bad joke.

Freezer glared at Apple, "I mean it!" he said.

Apple stopped laughing, "Oh I'm sorry." He said looking down at the floor.

Later on Apple was in his new room, it was much nicer than he expected, possibly because he had never been outside the projects, he then put the only item that he secretly took with him on the dresser, and it was a picture of his mom, "Man I think I like it here!"

Apple then jumped onto the bed and lied down, "Zarbon seems like a nice kid, although he's a little wild." Apple said.

The next day Freezer was in the desert area, in the auditorium. Dodoria, Zarbon, Kiwi and Cooler were with him. Apple came into the auditorium and sat down next to them. He smiled, "Let me guess, we're watching sports!" said Apple.

Freezer then looked at him sternly, "No an execution." Freezer said.

Apple could not believe his ears, "Who's going to be executed?" he asked trying to look natural.

"A spy," Freezer said.

Apple then started to sweat, "A spy hum?" he asked.

Freezer then looked at Apple and smiled cruelly, "Are you a spy Apple?" he asked.

Wow nobody ever asked him a question like that before, "No way, that's just wrong!" said Apple.

Freezer watched as the prisoner was taken to the platform where a block was waiting for him, he bent down and put his head on the block. The executioner had a black mask on and had a sword, Freezer then nodded his head yes, and the executioner chopped the prisoner's head off. Freezer then turned to Apple, "Well what do you think about that Apple, didn't I teach that bastard a lesson?" asked Freezer laughing.

Apple was even more nervous now; he had never seen an execution before, "Well how very interesting!" he said trying to hide his fear.

Freezer then laughed even more hysterically than ever, "Interesting that's so hilarious! Think about it now he won't have to have a neck for anything, he's halfway there!" said Freezer laughing at his lame pun.

Zarbon started crying, "That's not funny at all, that's sad!" he then started crying and ran out of the stadium.

Freezer was now pissed, "Zarbon get back here! I hate cowards you know! Dodoria go and find him and when you do, whip him with this!" Freezer then gave Dodoria a whip with spikes on it, which made Apple's nerves vibrate. "No wait, bring him to the auditorium so I can watch you whip him!" said Freezer.

Dodoria smiled, "Yes sir!" he laughed and ran out of the auditorium.

Apple could not take it anymore, he needed to do something to help poor little Zarbon, "No I'll go and find him!" he said running out of the auditorium.

Apple ran into the desert searching for Zarbon, "Zarbon, Zarbon!" he yelled. He heard some crying, and noticed an oasis with a rock next to it, there was little Zarbon behind it crying. "Zarbon there you are!" yelled Apple running over to him.

"Apple, Freezer is going to whip me!" said Zarbon.

Apple couldn't believe his ears, surely Freezer was joking, although after seeing that execution and seeing Freezer give Dodoria that wipe with spikes on it, he wasn't so sure anymore, "No I'm sure Freezer would do no such thing." Apple said.

Zarbon looked up surprised at Apple, "But Apple, he whips me when I misbehave." He said.

Apple then looked at Zarbon, "How is running away from an execution misbehaving? A lot of people don't like gore." Apple said.

"You don't understand! Freezer says that I'm a coward and that I deserve to get whipped if I chicken out!" said Zarbon.

Apple's eyes were now wide, "Freezer is that cruel hum? Oh no, so everyone and all the rumors that I heard about Freezer are true! Let's get you out of here kid, you can come and live with my mother and I until we can take you back to your home planet!" said Apple.

"But I will have nowhere to go!" said Zarbon.

"Well then you can just live with my mother and me!" said Apple grabbing Zarbon's hand, all the sudden Dodoria showed up.

"Not so fast!" said Dodoria as he slapped Apple in the face, pent down to the ground, scooped up a bunch of sand and put it into Apple's mouth, then he grabbed Zarbon.

"No let me go! Let me go! Let me go!" yelled Zarbon crying.

"You need to be punished for running away from an execution!" said Dodoria, who took Zarbon back to the auditorium.

Apple then got up and spit sand out of his mouth, "Oh no Zarbon!" Apple then ran after them.

Next thing you know, everyone was still in the auditorium, Apple then ran up to Freezer, "Freezer you can't do this!" he yelled.

"I'm the emperor of this planet; I'll do what I please! Whip Zarbon twenty times!" yelled Freezer.

Dodoria then said, "Yes sir!" he took Zarbon's shirt off, put chains on him and started whipping his back, Zarbon of course was screaming in pain.

"Freezer he's just a little boy!" yelled Apple.

Freezer then punched Apple, "Just for standing up for Zarbon, I'm going to have you whipped too! I love to see the suffering of others!" said Freezer.

After Zarbon was whipped Dodoria picked up Apple, chained him up and took the shirt off his back, "That is just as cruel as killing innocent people!" yelled Apple. Dodoria got the whip out again and started whipping his back, Freezer laughed hard.

Later on Apple and Zarbon were bandaging each other up. "I can't believe Freezer is really that cruel." Apple said.

"Yes he sure is." Zarbon said. All the sudden he started crying and hugged Apple, "You really do like me don't you?" he asked.

"Yes of course I do," said Apple.

"Why must Freezer be so cruel?" asked Zarbon.

"I don't know kid, I just don't know, but you have to remember that this universe is full of mostly good then evil." Apple said.

"Maybe if Freezer's mother was alive she wouldn't like this!" said Zarbon.

Oh no not Freezer's mom again, Apple remembered Freezer spitting out that his mother was a prostitute and that he was born out of wedlock, "What happened to Freezer's mother?" asked Apple.

"She died giving birth to Freezer." Zarbon said.

"How sad, I guess." Apple said.

"Freezer doesn't pay much attention to me." Said Zarbon

"Oh doesn't he?" asked Apple.

"No, he only does when he's lecturing me and punishing me." Zarbon said.

"Look I know that your mother is dead, she must have paid so much attention to you." Apple said.

"Yes she did, I miss her Apple, and I wish she was still alive. I know I was too young to remember, but I remember her very well." It is true, and Zarbon would remember her forever.

"Look Zarbon, I know that losing someone you love is not an easy thing. Let me tell you a secret, my father died when I was only ten, my mother was so upset that she threatened to commit suicide. Well we got her a councilor and then she got much better, but she was never the same after that. Your mother still loves you even though she is dead." Apple said.

"I know she does, she told me in spirit." Zarbon said.

"Zarbon your mother is dead." Apple said.

"She visits me in my dreams and she visited me when I was awake, I have the power to see ghosts." Zarbon said.

"Amazing," Said Apple.

"I thought it was normal, but Freezer doesn't know anything." Zarbon said.

"Well ghosts kind of scare me anyways." Apple said.

"They don't scare me very much, only the mutilated ones." Zarbon said.

"I have a present for you." Apple said.

"What is it?" asked Zarbon.

"I found it in the desert, do you like animals?" asked Apple.

"I love animals." Zarbon said.

"Well I got you something." Said Apple, he got a glass cage out and there was a scorpion in it.

"What is that?" asked Zarbon.

"It's a scorpion, it's a really fascinating creature, it kills it's pray with its stinger on its tail." Apple said.

"It's kind of cute, I want it! Please!" Zarbon said.

"Do you promise to take care of it? In other words, clean its cage out, and feed it plenty of crickets?" asked Apple.

"Yes I promise!" said Zarbon.

"Good, because it would be unfair to make Kiwi and I its legal guardian while you play in the sandbox ignoring it." Apple said.

"No I'm not like those kids that ignore their pets." Zarbon said.

"Also remember to watch out for its stinger, you don't want to get stung, it will hurt." Apple said.

"Can I pet it?" asked Zarbon.

"I'd prefer that you not." Apple said.

"Ok fair enough." Said Zarbon taking the glass cage and putting it on a table next to his bed, he looked at the scorpion. "I wonder what I'm going to name it." He said.

"I haven't a clue, how about Midnight Star." Apple said.

"No, how about Pinchy!" said Zarbon.

"Yah that's a cute name!" said Apple.

"Pinchy it is!" said Zarbon.

Freezer was in his main thrown room playing cards with Cooler, yes they hated each other, but so what, cannot two brothers play cards? "Have any threes?" asked Cooler.

"Go fish!" said Freezer.

Cooler picked a card up and won, "I beat you again!" said Cooler.

"Damn it Cooler!" said Freezer putting down his cards.

Cooler then smiled, "Sometimes I hate having you as a brother, and you're so spoiled! But I beat you fair and square!" said Cooler laughing.

"I'm getting out of the throne room right now!" said Freezer knocking the table across the room with his tail and left the room.

"I hate you!" said Cooler.

Freezer bumped into Dodoria in the hallway, "Freezer how was playing cards with Cooler?" asked Dodoria.

"I lost again; you have to be his henchman for a week." Freezer said looking sadly at Dodoria.

"No not again, I want you Freezer not Cooler!" said Dodoria.

"Don't whine about it Dodoria, just go along with it." Freezer said.

"Oh that was so wrong!" said Dodoria.

Cooler came out of the throne room, "Come on Dodoria, I want you to rub my back and my feet!" said Cooler scrunching his toes on the floor.

"Yes master Cooler!" said Dodoria.

Freezer went into the room that Apple and Zarbon were in, "Zarbon come on it's your bedtime! Want to sleep in my room and play a little game with me?" asked Freezer.

Zarbon sighed, "Ok Freezer." He got up, went over to him, and stood in front of him.

Freezer glared at Apple, "Apple you will never leave this place alive, I lost all respect for you, you better watch your back!" said Freezer.

"Yes sir." Apple said.

Freezer turned to Zarbon and they walked out of the room, "So how was your day today?" asked Freezer.

"Freezer I have a new pet, it's a scorpion!" said Zarbon.

"Oh how nice, I hate scorpions," said Freezer.

Apple then sighed, "Well I guess that I have to send letters to my mother then, that Zarbon sure is a nice kid, it's a shame." Apple said walking back to his room.

End of Story


	3. Chapter 3

_The Death of Pinchy _

Zarbon was doing some spring-cleaning with Kiwi and Apple; Freezer suggested that Zarbon keep his room tidy. Kiwi was dusting and Apple was polishing, whereas Zarbon was picking things up and putting them in his closet.

"Hey Zarbon, did you change Pinchy's water?" asked Apple.

"Yes I did, and I caught a lot of crickets yesterday too and put them in his cage." Zarbon said.

"Well I'm glad you're not one of those kids that depend on their parents to take care of their small animals; I used to have to do that." Kiwi said.

"Wait you had children?" asked Apple.

"Well I used to have a family yes, but sadly my children were murdered by my girlfriend and she then shot herself with a laser gun." Kiwi said.

"Wow that's so sad." Zarbon said.

"Well what can I say, that was a long time ago and I never wanted to go out with any girl ever since then." Kiwi said.

"I'm sorry for your lost." Zarbon said.

"It's all right Zarbon, just be lucky that you don't have kids." Kiwi said.

Apple rolled his eyes, "Shall we clean Pinchy's cage?" asked Apple.

"Sure let me get him into his plastic container first." Zarbon then opened the glass cage and took the scorpion out and put him in the plastic container, he looked at Pinchy, funny he was not moving.

"Hey Kiwi I have a question?" asked Zarbon.

"I don't know anything about scorpions, except they give me the creeps." Kiwi said.

"What does it usually mean when scorpions are put into a plastic container and don't start moving?" asked Zarbon.

"What are you talking about?" asked Apple.

"Whenever I usually take Pinchy out of the cage and put him into a plastic container, he usually starts turning and moving, but he's not moving!" said Zarbon.

"Let's take a look!" said Apple, who looked at the very still scorpion. "You're right he's not moving!" said Apple.

"Ok step aside!" said Kiwi carrying a pencil.

"What are you doing with that pencil?" asked Zarbon.

"Relax I'm just going to poke him with it." Said Kiwi, so he did just that and flinched.

"Don't do that, how would you like it if someone did that to you?" asked Zarbon.

"I don't think he really cares now, because he's still not moving!" said Kiwi.

"You mean?" asked Apple.

"Yep he's in a much better place!" said Kiwi.

"He died? He died?" asked Zarbon in shock.

Tears started falling from Zarbon's eyes. "No it's not true! I did everything that you told me to do Apple, I fed him, I cleaned his cage, and I gave him plenty of water!" yelled Zarbon crying.

"Well I'm afraid that Kiwi is right, he's gone, see I can pick him up without getting stung," said Apple picking Pinchy up.

"No don't leave me Pinchy! Don't leave me!" yelled Zarbon throwing a temper tantrum.

"Kid you have to face the facts he's dead!" said Kiwi.

"Come on Zarbon, we'll go bury him in the rainforest." Apple said.

Therefore, Zarbon, Kiwi and Apple went to the rainforest and they buried Pinchy next to a rock, "So what do we say to honor a dead scorpion?" asked Kiwi.

"I'll say something nice, he was a kind little fellow and he loved Zarbon in his own way, even though he pinched him twice," said Apple.

"Yah and he stung me a few times, but I was just getting used to them." Zarbon expect.

"Well what did you expect that it would cuddle with you?" asked Kiwi.

"Shall we sing amazing grace?" asked Apple.

"No that is retarded!" said Kiwi.

"Don't be so insensitive, he was important to Zarbon, even though he could be nasty." Apple said.

"No I think Kiwi is right, singing won't bring Pinchy back!" said Zarbon covering his eyes up.

"Ok I'll go pick some flowers, I'll be right back." Said Kiwi, he went further into the woods, and then he came back with some weeds and put them on Pinchy's grave.

"Kiwi those are weeds! I thought you meant flowers, not weeds! " Apple said.

"What's the difference?" asked Kiwi.

"Here let me go and find some real flowers!" said Apple going into the woods, he came back with some tulips and put them on Pinchy's grave.

"They're so beautiful!" Zarbon said.

"Now we close this funeral service up by saying that Pinchy will be dearly missed, what I will miss most about him is when he used to drink his water." Apple said.

"What I will miss about him is when he used to crawl up my arm when I put him on it." Zarbon said.

"Isn't that dangerous?" asked Kiwi.

"So what, I don't see you doing very safe things!" said Zarbon.

"Ok what will I miss most of all about Pinchy?" said Kiwi. He thought up what could he possibly miss about a nasty little bug that wanted no more then to sting people. Then Kiwi thought of an idea, "I'll miss it when he used to crush the crickets up and ate them!" said Kiwi.

Zarbon and Apple looked at Kiwi like he was a nutcase, then again Kiwi was a thoughtless and tactless person, but did not possess the cruelty of Freezer. "Ok have a nice time wherever you're going!" said Zarbon.

Then Zarbon, Kiwi and Apple went home.

At dinner time, Zarbon was just staring into space with a depressed look on his face, Freezer was getting creeped out because of this, "Zarbon hello are you with us?" asked Freezer.

"Yes Freezer." He said in a sad voice.

"What the hell is wrong with you tonight, you haven't touched your dinner, you love crocodile!" said Freezer.

"I'm not hungry." Zarbon said.

"I know what you're trying to do, you're trying to say that you're not hungry then you will say that you are when we bring out desert!" said Freezer.

"No, that's not it," Zarbon said.

"What is it? Is it not cooked right?" asked Freezer.

"Pinchy died today." Zarbon said.

"Who the hell is Pinchy?" asked Freezer.

"He was Zarbon's scorpion, we found him dead this morning when we were cleaning his room." Kiwi said.

"I can't believe he's gone!" said Zarbon sobbing and lying his head down, he sobbed some more.

Freezer looked at him funny, "Ok let's have the talk about life." He said getting up and walking over to Zarbon.

Freezer bent down and looked at Zarbon, "Now I'm capable of compassion, but I will have to tell you that life sucks and sometimes when people don't do what others tell them to do, then they die like mice!" said Freezer.

"You mean you killed Pinchy?" asked Zarbon.

"No I didn't, but the point is that you can always get a new one." Freezer said.

"I don't want a new scorpion, I want Pinchy!" said Zarbon.

"You're cleaning Pinchy's cage out tonight and that's final!" yelled Freezer.

"Uh compassionate my ass." Cooler said chuckling as he was sipping his wine.

Later on in Zarbon's room, Kiwi was standing behind him, "Come on Zarbon you have to do it sooner or later." Kiwi said.

"Maybe he'll come back." Zarbon said.

"No he won't he's dead." Kiwi said.

"No I mean in spirit." Zarbon said.

"Sorry kid, but where he is, he's probably having a ball in the afterlife crawling under wood and rocks." Kiwi said.

"Ok let's do it." Zarbon said, but before they could, Zarbon lifted up the piece of wood that he had in the cage for Pinchy, he flinched and noticed something odd.

"Hey Kiwi, I know how you know little about scorpions, but why are there baby scorpions in the cage?" asked Zarbon.

"What are you talking about?" asked Kiwi.

"Take a look!" Zarbon pointed to eight white baby scorpions on the piece of wood.

"So wait, Pinchy was a girl, oh this just gets better and better!" Kiwi said.

"She must have given birth before she died, but how is it that we didn't notice it until now?" asked Zarbon.

"Does that piece of wood ring a bell?" asked Kiwi pointing to the wood.

"Pinchy is dead and that means that she can't look after her babies!" said Zarbon.

"Oh no! Oh no! That is a terrible idea!" said Kiwi.

"Please Kiwi, wouldn't you want someone to look after you if you were a baby and your mother died?" asked Zarbon.

"I wouldn't really have any perception about the future if I were an infant!" said Kiwi.

"Please, I'll take care of them!" said Zarbon.

"No way, we're letting them out tonight, it's the right thing to do!" said Kiwi.

All the sudden Apple came into the room with Windex and a cloth, "Ok let's get to cleaning that cage!" said Apple.

"Apple, Pinchy was a girl!" said Zarbon.

"How do you figure?" asked Apple.

"Because she had babies!" said Kiwi.

Apple looked into the cage and saw the babies on the piece of wood, "Ok so what do you think we should do?" asked Apple.

"I think we should let them go, it's horrible to keep an animal locked up in a cage!" said Kiwi.

"No Kiwi is wrong, I miss Pinchy and the babies are all I have to remember her by!" said Zarbon.

"Apple tell Zarbon that I'm right!" said Kiwi.

"Actually I could use some company." Apple said.

"What?" Kiwi asked.

"In other words, I think it would be nice if I had a pet." Apple said.

"But...But…it's the wrong thing to…" before Kiwi could finish, Apple interrupted him.

"I think we should keep them, after all its like Zarbon said, she must have left him an inheritance for a special reason." Apple said.

"Scorpions don't leave inheritances!" said Kiwi.

"When they get older I'll take one out of the cage, but in the mean time, raise them together." Apple said.

"Thanks Apple you're a real pal!" said Zarbon hugging him.

Kiwi rolled his eyes, "This is a terrible idea!" he said.

A couple of months later, the cage was filled with adult scorpions instead of babies, perhaps this species grew up fast? Anyways, Zarbon was trying to give the scorpions water and he almost got stung doing it.

"Wow you're a feisty one aren't you?" asked Zarbon.

Apple walked into the room, "Hey Zarbon since the babies are grown up, can I have one like you promised?" asked Apple.

"Of course pick one out." Zarbon said.

"Ok let's see, I think I like this one." Apple then put his hand in the cage trying to get the one he wanted out, but then it stung him.

"Ouch! Mother fucker!" yelled Apple.

"Apple are you all right, I mean this is possibly the first time I've ever heard you curse!" said Zarbon.

"I just got stung, no I'm not alright!" said Apple sucking on his finger.

"Come on, let's go wash it off with some water and soap." Zarbon said taking Apple out of the room.

The only flaw to taking Apple to wash his wound was that Zarbon left the door opened, and Kiwi now had a chance to sneak into the room. "Ok let's get this over with." He said.

Kiwi put the cover on and picked the cage up, "Let's let all of you go! There are plenty of bugs outside, much better than those crickets!" said Kiwi. As he was carrying the cage, he slipped on one of Zarbon's toys and fell, the cover went flying off and the scorpions escaped.

"Ouch shit! I think I just broke my butt!" Kiwi yelled, and then got up.

He noticed that the scorpions have all escaped, "Oh no, no this can't be happening!" yelled Kiwi.

All the sudden Zarbon and Apple came back into the room, "It's all right now that I put some alcohol on it." said Zarbon.

"Yah but it still hurts!" said Apple.

All the sudden Zarbon was shocked to see Kiwi, "Kiwi what are you doing here?" he asked, then he looked at the shattered glass cage, "You didn't?" he said.

"Look it was time for them to be set free!" said Kiwi.

"So you smashed the cage and set them free in the palace?" asked Apple.

"No I tripped, I was going to take them outside!" said Kiwi.

"Great, now they're lose, what are we going to do?" asked Zarbon.

"I say we tell nobody about this!" said Kiwi.

"Well what if for some reason a scorpion ends up in Freezer's bed and he gets stung?" asked Zarbon.

"Yah like that will ever happen!" said Kiwi.

Well that night, Freezer had his P-jays on; he yawned and got into bed. "Goodnight Teddy." He said hugging his teddy bear tightly.

Little did Freezer know that there was one of Pinchy's babies under his covers, somehow it climbed into bed with him, and then it stung Freezer. "Ouch shit!" yelled Freezer, then he took a newspaper, and smashed the bug.

Later on that night, Zarbon, Apple and Kiwi had to report to Freezer's office. They stood there curious to know what happened. "So tell me, why was there a scorpion in my bed?" asked Freezer.

"I don't know anything!" said Kiwi.

"There was a scorpion in your bed?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes and I slapped it! See!" said Freezer showing the newspaper that he smashed the bug with, with the bug's guts still on it.

"You killed one of Pinchy's babies!" said Zarbon about to start crying.

Freezer had a confused look on his face, "Didn't I tell you to clean that cage out?" he asked.

"Yes but she had babies, and I couldn't just kill them, I wanted to raise them and…." Before Zarbon could finish, Freezer interrupted him.

"You don't bring up a scorpion, that's what wildlife experts are for! Whose idea was it to raise these horrible creatures?" asked Freezer.

Apple tried to look innocent, "So Apple you're the one who told Zarbon it would be ok to raise scorpions!" said Freezer.

"It's perfectly understandable, I wanted a pet, so I asked him too…" before Apple could finish, Freezer interrupted again.

"You blockhead, you should have never have gotten him a scorpion in the first place!" Freezer said slapping the newspaper onto the desk to the point where Zarbon, Kiwi and Apple jumped.

"I told you there would be a scorpion in Freezer's bed." Zarbon said.

"Don't rub it in!" said Kiwi.

"So why the hell did you try to murder me? You know that you gave him a non-venomous scorpion right?" asked Freezer.

"We didn't that's the whole point! I gave Pinchy to Zarbon because I just wanted him to have company when Kiwi and I went to bed. You haven't a clue how lonely of a kid he actually is!" said Apple.

"Find those other scorpions, I don't care if you kill them, well actually kill them I don't want any more scorpions in this palace understood?" asked Freezer slapping the newspaper onto the desk, everyone once again jumped.

"Yes lord Freezer!" they all said.

"Now go to bed you invisils!" said Freezer.

Later on that evening, Freezer was talking to Cooler and Dodoria in the dining room.

"I can't believe that Zarbon didn't do as I told him to do!" said Freezer.

"What did you expect from such a little brat!" yelled Dodoria.

Cooler then shook his head, "Do you suppose we need to teach Zarbon and those thick babysitters of his a lesson?" asked Cooler.

"No let's just hope that we don't find another one of Pinchy's children!" said Freezer.

"Speaking of there is a scorpion on the table!" yelled Dodoria.

"Well do something about it you idiot!" yelled Freezer.

"No problem!" Dodoria said, he jumped onto the table and snatched the scorpion up and took a bite out of it, "Damn it tastes better then I imagined!" Dodoria said.

"Ew that is disgusting! Never the less at least it's a good thing that it's dead!" said Freezer.

"Another one just ran across the table!" Cooler said pointing to the scorpion running across the table.

"Looks like it's time for desert!" yelled Dodoria jumping onto the table again, but the scorpion ran away safely and this time the table broke and it smashed Freezer and Cooler. "Ops," Said Dodoria.

"Dodoria get out of here now!" said Freezer.

"I'm going, I'm going!" he got up and ran out of the room.

"We need to hire an exterminator!" said Freezer.

The next day the exterminator came by, and started hunting the remaining of Pinchy's babies, when Zarbon saw him he walked up to him, "Excuse me sir, I haven't seen you around here before." He said.

The exterminator looked at Zarbon, "I heard that you people have an infestation of scorpions, I took care of the problem." He said.

"What do you mean you took care of the problem?" asked Zarbon.

"In other words I killed all the ones I found, there weren't as many as Freezer said there were," he said.

"How many did you kill?" asked Zarbon.

"I got five of them! I believe that was all of them," the exterminator said.

"Well are there any left? " asked Zarbon.

"Nope that's it, sorry kid." The exterminator said walking away.

"No now Pinchy won't have any grandchildren!" said Zarbon running into his bedroom. He put his face into his pillow and started crying. All the sudden something crawled onto his arm, he looked and saw that it was the last remaining scorpion of Pinchy's litter.

"Oh my God how did you get here?" asked Zarbon.

All the sudden Kiwi came into the room, "Did you hear, all the babies are dead!" said Kiwi.

"No just one survived." Zarbon said showing the descendent of Pinchy.

"Come on we have to do the right thing," said Kiwi taking Zarbon by the hand and leading him outside.

When they were outside, they were next to Pinchy's grave, "Well I guess this is goodbye," said Zarbon as he put the scorpion down, and then it ran off.

"See that wasn't so bad now was it?" asked Kiwi.

"Well I just didn't want Freezer to kill all of them, at least one of them survived." Zarbon said.

"Come on lets go back inside," said Kiwi, he walked with Zarbon back towards the palace, and Zarbon turned around to look back at Pinchy's grave one last time, and turned to walk towards the palace.

End of Story


	4. Chapter 4

_Shasha_

Freezer looked out his bedroom window probably wondering where his life would take him, all the sudden a little turquoise, cute, six-year old boy snuck into his room. He wore a warrior headband and a karate suit, his green, thick hair pulled back into a ponytail.

He snuck up behind Freezer, jumped onto his back, and put his hands over Freezer's eyes completely covering them. "Guess who?" asked Zarbon.

Freezer was annoyed with this little primal changeling, "Oh Kiwi?" he asked.

"Nope!" Zarbon said.

"Apple?" asked Freezer sarcastically.

"No silly!" Zarbon said.

"Ok Zarbon!" Freezer said.

"That's correct!" Zarbon then released his hands from Freezer's eyes.

"Ok Zarbon I think that you need a nap!" Freezer said.

"But Freezer I'm not tired!" Zarbon said.

"Oh so what, it's good for you." Freezer said.

"Do Kiwi and Apple have to watch me sleep?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes they do, and remember no wondering off. You'll get yourself hurt or killed, also remember Zarbon; your new trainer is coming today." Freezer said.

"Really what's his name?" asked Zarbon.

"His name is Shasha; he's also the same species as you are. He's going to teach you gymnastics, martial arts, how to fly, how to do many other things, but most of all how to transform." Freezer said.

"Is he nice?" Zarbon asked.

"Well he's strict, but I'm sure you two will get along, well go take your nap now I'll get you up when he gets here. How about a little peck on the cheek?" Freezer asked offering Zarbon his cheek.

"Ok." Zarbon kissed Freezer's cheek, jumped into Freezer's arms and Freezer took him to his room.

Freezer entered Zarbon's room with Zarbon still in his arms, he set him down, and Zarbon crawled under the covers, while Freezer tucked him in. "Tell me a story." Zarbon said.

"Oh I'm not much of a storyteller." Freezer said.

"Tell me a story now! Please you told me a story yesterday and it was terrible now tell me another one!" Zarbon said.

Freezer was so annoyed with that little naïve brat, "All right! Oh, I got one, once upon a time, there was a young king, who was raised by a troll, and then he grew up into a handsome young man, and did all the dirty work for him. The end." Freezer said smiling.

" Freezer!" Zarbon said.

"Now what?" Freezer asked.

"That doesn't sound very nice!" Zarbon said.

"It's like I said, I'm not must of a storyteller." Freezer said getting off the bed and about to leave the room, "Good day Zarbon,"

"Good day Freezer." Zarbon then fell asleep.

Freezer shut the door, "I'm so glad that annoying brat is asleep!" he said walking back to his room.

Hours later after Zarbon's nap, Kiwi and Apple were playing cards with Zarbon. "I won again!" Kiwi said.

"Oh man!" Apple said.

"You are such a sore loser Apple, although I'm not much of a card player myself." All the sudden, Zarbon sensed Freezer coming with his psychic powers, "Oh God I think Freezer's coming! I already took a boring one-hour nap!" Zarbon said.

"Everyone act normal!" Kiwi said.

Freezer walked in to see Zarbon pretending to be sleeping under the covers while Kiwi and Apple pretended to be reading magazines, "Zarbon wake up! Your trainer is here!" Freezer yelled.

Zarbon fake yawned and opened one of his gold eyes up, "Hello Freezer what do you want?"

"Get up boy!" Freezer said losing patience with Zarbon.

Zarbon just sat there staring into space, "But I'm too tired!" he then giggled.

"Oh for God's sake," Freezer grabbed Zarbon and carried him in his arms, and took him outside.

At the space pod grounds outside that is a man was standing there waiting. He was the color dark blue, his hair was dark blue, thick, and short. He was muscular, and about 6'2 or 6'1 in height. He was wearing hoop earrings and his eyes were the color red!

He was kind of handsome, but kind of psycho looking, his most distinguished feature was his big scar going across his the right side of his face, from his eyebrow down his cheek. He had an Egyptian kilt on, with Roman sandals on, also dressed in a trench coat with his bare chest showing.

"Bring me the child!" He had a Russian accent, which sounded deep and raspy.

Little Zarbon was scared, "Dear god!" He covered his eyes, and ran and hid behind Freezer, "His voice sounds like his has a cold!"

"Zarbon you idiot, his voice just sounds horse." Freezer said.

"Yes, you must be Zarbon." The man said.

"I'm Zarbon, and your name sir?" asked Zarbon.

"My name is Shasha, I'm from another planet under Primal Changeling colony, it's called Planet Cyrillic, or planet Russia 2. I believe your father's mother was from my planet!

"I wouldn't know that. How did you end up speaking Russian and not English or Japanese?" asked Zarbon.

"My planet was discovered by the humans from another universe, we picked the language up somehow, but I'm the same species as you!" Shasha then smiled, "Come young Primal we start at once!" he said.

Zarbon was upset, "What, just like that?"

"Yes young one, Freezer tells me you need to lose some weight." Shasha said.

"I have picked up some weight haven't I?" Zarbon asked giggling.

"Yes I do get carried away spoiling him with the sweets; he has a real sweet tooth." Freezer said.

"Can eat I'm hungry." Zarbon said.

"No because you'll pick up even more weight, and I don't want you to be obese! Let's go kid!" He grabbed Zarbon's hand and took him to the gym.

They were in the gym stretching, "Now Zarbon, I remember when I first moved here, I was only teenager, after I killed my mother I escaped captivity from my home planet. Freezer took me in when I wanted to work for him. I've lived here most of my adult life; I'm now at least in my early 40s." Shasha said.

'That wasn't nice of you to kill your mother." Zarbon said.

Shasha closed his eyes, "I had my reasons." All the sudden a young woman in her late 20s came in, her name was Gertrude, "Hello Freezer wants you to take Zarbon outside for a walk." She said in her German sounding accent.

"Excuse me Zarbon." Shasha walked over to the woman and slapped her in the face, "Since when do you give me orders wench!" Shasha yelled.

"I got them from Freezer!" Gertrude shook with fear.

"Which reminds me, Freezer wants me to give you this!" He gave her a piece of paper.

"What is it?" she asked.

"It's death warrant, he claims that you haven't been working hard enough. So you have to die, allow me to be your executer so you my escape being on the chopping block!" Shasha grabbed her neck, snapped it, and she fell down dead.

Zarbon was in shock, "What did you do Shasha? What did you do?" He asked.

"I just killed her on Freezer's orders, he told me as soon as she got in here to give it to her!" Shasha said trying to justify his killing of a helpless woman.

"Will she be okay? Can I heal her, I have healing powers!" Zarbon said.

"No don't worry about it, just be lucky I didn't sexually use her! It's just like tiger hunting prey, it's not big deal." Shasha said.

Zarbon gulped and then slaps himself in the face so he can try to be less afraid, "So shall we start exercising again?" he asked.

Shasha looked at him funny, "No go play for a while, you deserve break." Shasha said.

"Where?" asked Zarbon.

"Outside," Shasha said.

"Ok!" Zarbon said.

Zarbon played out by the desert, a mile away from the palace, Freezer forbade him to play there without an escort. Zarbon did a karate move, "As soon as Shasha gets out here, I'm going to give it to him good!" he said.

All the sudden he saw a beautiful butterfly, "Oh how pretty!" He started chasing it, "Hey come back here! I want to get a good look at you!" he yelled.

He tripped and stumbled into a big ditch like area, the truth be told, it was actually the gallows, he saw hundreds of dead bodies hanging and rotting, changelings, primal changelings, Sayains, and various other species of aliens. "Hey will you guys play with me?" he asked.

He went up to a body and touched it, it did not move, "Wait a minute these people are dead!" Zarbon said.

"Zarbon!" A spirit of a Sayain called out.

"Zarbon!" A spirit of a Changeling called out.

"Zarbon! Get out; you and your adoptive father aren't wanted here!" A spirit of a primal changeling yelled.

Zarbon was scared as he started to see many spirits with their necks broken, "Right you are!" He ran out of the ditch giving a blood-curling scream, he ran back to the palace.

"Freezer! Freezer!" Zarbon went up to hug him.

"What is it Zarbon, what's wrong?" asked Freezer.

"It all started when Shasha killed that girl that you sent to him, then he made me play outside alone, I stumbled into a ditch and I saw dead people hanging! There were hundreds of them! I saw their ghosts!" Zarbon said.

Freezer rolled his eyes, "Now Zarbon dead bodies are something I'm used to. There are no such things as ghosts." Freezer said. Unlike Freezer, Zarbon had medium, psychic and sorcerer powers, his third eye worked to the point where he could feel a spirit solidly.

"Why were they dead?" Zarbon asked.

"Because Zarbon, they were committing crimes, and they commit crimes every day, so whenever someone commits a crime, hundreds of people have to suffer for it." Freezer said.

"Really?" Zarbon asked.

"I'm afraid so. You were outside playing alone?" Freezer asked.

"Yes," Zarbon said.

"Shasha!" Freezer cried.

Shasha came running in, "Yes sir?"

"Didn't I tell you to escort Zarbon outside and watch him play?" asked Freezer.

"I hate babysitting him! He's not even your real son!" Shasha said.

"Shasha just because he's adopted doesn't make him any less part of the family; he's the future heir to my thrown. I can't make children because I'm infertile." Freezer said.

"Why can't you make children?

"Cooler kicked me in the balls too much whenever we roughed housed too much, it was when I was little. We used to karate kick each other, my father taught us karate, and he always beat me up too. One time I bleed and I was taken to the hospital, they told my father that I wouldn't be able to produce children. Now that I adopted one of my own I'm happy, I guess." Freezer said.

"So why did you take me in after mum left me here?" asked Zarbon.

"For some stupid reason, I always wanted a child; all of Cooler's children are his own blood. Too bad all their mothers are dead, oh well it's no big deal. Plus your mother was going through a nervous breakdown and thought you would be best raised by someone else." Freezer said.

"You mean my cousins are your blood and Cooler's?" asked Zarbon.

"Yes Zarbon, but mostly his." Freezer said.

"What now Freezer, are we going to have tea?" Shasha asked.

"Shasha shut up! Why don't you tell Zarbon more about yourself?" Freezer said.

Shasha cracked his knuckles, "I learned karate from Freezer, I would sometimes train with Cooler's children, and may I admit that some of your cousins are cute!" he then laughed.

"Shasha enough with the lust!" Freezer said.

"Anyways, I'm the best friend of Dodoria, I met him when we were just teenagers, now we hang out and conquer planets together, and kill people and rape women and….." Before Shasha could finish, Freezer interrupted him.

"Ok that's enough he gets the point Shasha! Now show me something you taught Zarbon today!" Freezer said.

"We just stretched is all." Shasha said.

"Well that's a good start, but not good enough, get serious for once Shasha!" Freezer said.

Dodoria came into the room, "Shasha buddy!" he said running towards him.

"Dodoria!" Shasha said running towards Dodoria, they hugged one another, "Здраствуй! Как дела?" Shasha asked.

"Where have you been, I missed you!" Dodoria said.

Shasha smiled and then said, "I've been touring galaxies and I guess I got little bit carried away, what have you been up to?"

"Nothing, I married twice, but they both left me! So I see you met Zarbon! Isn't he such a brat?" asked Dodoria, he could not stand Zarbon.

"Sure I guess I barely know him! Let's go have some lunch! See you later Zarbon!" Shasha said as he left the room with Dodoria.

"Bye Shasha!" Zarbon said. He looked at Freezer with wide eyes, "Well that was more then I needed to know about you and Shasha." He said.

"Don't worry Zarbon as long as you do what Shasha says he won't get so impatient with you. Now go take a nap you're driving me insane!" Freezer said.

"Oh man!" Zarbon said.

End of Story


	5. Chapter 5

_She Cried When She Saw Me_

Zarbon was six years old and Shasha trained him, the harsh primal changeling from planet Cyrillic, and he was hard to train because Zarbon was not a fighter by nature, but more of a gentle soul.

"Zarbon concentrate, you must be powerful someday! Ok let's take break!" Shasha said giving up.

"Shasha, I have no one to play with. " Zarbon said.

"You have Kiwi and Apple." Shasha said taking a huge bite out of an apple to the point where part of the core showed.

"No not them, someone my own age! Sometimes Kiwi and Apple are too busy to play with me." Zarbon said looking sad.

"I see what you mean kid." Shasha said in his thick, deep, horse Russian accent. It seemed that the first time in that horrible rapist's life, he felt sorry for someone else besides himself, or maybe it was just because he was the same species as Zarbon.

Shasha went to Freezer's room later on, talking to him, while Freezer got dressed, "He says that he wants playmate!" Shasha said.

Freezer could not believe what was coming out of Shasha's mouth, "You mean like a Playboy bunny playmate?" asked Freezer.

"He means someone his own age!" Shasha said.

"He has Kiwi and Apple; he can't be a spoiled brat all the time! I do not have time to worry about him; I need to deal with the Carpathian king. I want his planet and he refuses to surrender it to me! Therefore he must pay!" Freezer said.

Shasha thought of an idea, "Maybe you could raise his daughter; she's quite young you know! She's about Zarbon's age!"

"But even she's not stupid enough to fall for my tricks, that's a good idea! Go get her!" Freezer said.

"Yes sir!" Shasha said.

Shasha went to planet Carpathian causing ciaos, the Carpathian king ran with his wife and his five-year old daughter, they were not an attractive species, but they were not that ugly either.

"My dear, take Liya inside the palace and stay in there!" The king said with a British sounding accent.

"What about you?" asked the queen who also spoke in a British accent.

"Just do it!" The king kissed the queen's hand and ran off.

"Right, come on Liya!" The queen said taking Liya by the hand and taking her inside.

Shasha ran towards the palace, but the king stopped him, "Get out of my way!" Shasha yelled.

"Get off my peaceful planet! I'll do anything to defend my family!" The king yelled.

"Out of my way weakling!" Shasha hit him and ran into the palace.

In the palace, the queen and Liya were inside the throne room. The queen held on little Liya who was shaking, "It's ok Liya, we'll be just fine! "

All the sudden, Shasha broke the sliding door down and walked into the room, "Go hide Liya now!" the queen yelled, but Liya just stood there.

"I'm just here for her!" Shasha said.

"Don't get near her!" The queen yelled getting into the way.

Shasha slapped her in the face, grabbed her neck and snapped it. "Oh yes I will!" He laughed and looked over at Liya, "Hello there cutie!" He yelled.

Liya looked afraid of him, "Boy you're really pretty thing!" He smiled at her, "What's wrong, are you afraid of me?" he asked. She tried to run away, but Shasha grabbed her, threw her onto his back while she screamed, then walked out of the palace.

The king ran in and saw his wife on the floor dead, but no Liya in sight, he then started crying, "Liya!" he yelled. This would be the last time he would ever see her alive, it was sad.

Back on planet Freezer, later on, Shasha returned and went into the main thrown room with Liya under his arm. "Freezer I have her here!" he yelled. He dropped her onto the floor and laughed.

"Excellent!" Freezer said.

Liya then said, "Where am I?" she like her parents spoke with a British accent.

"In my palace, welcome Liya! You'll be living here for the rest of your life, while I take your father's planet as my own! I have a new playmate for you; you will probably like him very much! He's waiting outside for you!" Freezer said.

Zarbon waited outside the main thrown room, Freezer then stepped out, "Zarbon meet your new playmate!" he said.

"Look happy Liya! Smile," Shasha said. Liya walked out and looked at Zarbon.

Zarbon bawd down to her, "Who are you miss?" He asked.

"This is Princess Liya she'll be living with us from now on! Zarbon you can quit bowing now! Look at her!" Freezer said.

Zarbon looked at Liya, he thought she was lovely for some odd reason, he blushed, "You're very pretty! I'm Zarbon!" he then grabbed her hand and kissed it.

Liya slapped Zarbon in the face, "Don't touch me!" she yelled. Shasha laughed hard.

'If I offended you I'm sorry, could you forgive me?" asked Zarbon.

"No!" Liya yelled.

"I'm sorry." Zarbon said not knowing what Shasha actually did to get her here.

Liya got feisty again, "For what my mother?" asked Liya.

Zarbon decided to break the ice a little better, "So how old are you?" he asked.

"I'm five years old, what's it to you!" Liya said.

"I just recently turned six." Zarbon said.

"I'll be six next month." Liya said.

"Come on Zarbon you have training to do!" Shasha said grabbing little Zarbon's arm and taking him away.

"Bye Liya!" Zarbon yelled.

Liya crossed her arms, "Humph!"

Zarbon and Shasha were in the training room, "Come on Zarbon try to transform!" Shasha said.

"I can't do it!" Zarbon said trying as hard as he could, he looked like he was in pain, but then he let out a huge fart, "Ops that wasn't me!" he said blushing.

"Oh Christ, like this!" Shasha transformed into a hideous creature. "Think of yourself as beast! Let it out of you! Now, this time don't pass gas!" Shasha said in his now raspier sounding Russian accent.

Again Zarbon tried, this time he ended up doing it for the first time in his life, he was now ugly, "Have I done it?" he asked in a raspy sounding voice.

"Yah look at yourself!" Shasha gave Zarbon a mirror.

Zarbon looked into the mirror, "Ew, I'm ugly, kind of cool! I should show Liya!" he then ran out of the room. Not knowing that he was about to find out what kind of a harsh world he actually lived in besides the fact the Freezer was cruel to him and everyone else.

"Zarbon wait!" Shasha said.

In the hallway, Zarbon transformed back into his regular form again, and then headed to the garden.

Liya was in the garden crying, Zarbon then ran into the garden to see her.

"Hello Liya! Why are you crying?" asked the innocent Zarbon who did not know that Shasha murdered her mother in cold blood.

"Oh go away you spoiled brat!" She yelled.

"I have something for you!" he said. He then did a magic trick by clapping his hands together and out of the palm of his hand appeared a rose, which was red. "I see that red is your favorite color!" he then handed the rose to her.

Liya smiled sarcastically, "Oh how lovely, you know magic." She smelled the rose, "It smells lovely, and looks lovely!" Then she ripped the rose up. "I'm not the least bit impressed!" she yelled.

Zarbon could not believe it; she was acting like a total hassle to please, so he decided it was time, "Want to see what else I can do?" Then it happened, Zarbon transformed into a horrible looking beast, "Isn't this neat?" he asked smiling.

Liya got scared, "No it's hideous looking! Get away from me you beast! Oh what am I kidding, I can just run away!" She screamed and ran away.

"Hey come back! Oh well I'll try to catch her later!" He ran back into the palace.

Zarbon was walking in the palace, when all the sudden Dodoria pushed him to the ground. "Watch where you're going you hideous freak!" he yelled he laughed with a bunch of Freezer's other men.

"Hello Dodoria!" Zarbon said a little depressed, Dodoria liked to pick on Zarbon because he was smaller than he was, and he was such a sweet kid that it sickened him.

"Wow no kidding she ran away from a freak like you! You should join the circus!" Dodoria laughed.

"I can't join the circus, I'm afraid of clowns!" Poor Zarbon said about to sob.

"Well they're probably more scared of you; you're a monster and an ugly, hideous looking freak!" Dodoria laughed some more, "If you looked into the mirror then it would crack!" he said.

"Well I did look and it didn't crack!" Zarbon said trying to hold his tears back.

"Maybe it didn't want to hurt your feelings, oh wait you're an ugly monster, you have no feelings!" Dodoria said.

"I'll just go now!" Zarbon said getting up, but Dodoria kicked him in the stomach.

"When are you going to be cute again? I take that back, you aren't cute, you put on even more weight this time than when you were in your normal form!" Dodoria said laughing.

"Stop it, right now!" Zarbon started crying.

"Oh what are you going to do? Cry you ugly crybaby?" Everyone laughed hard.

"Dodoria leave him alone! Come on Zarbon!" Freezer took Zarbon by the hand and walked to his room.

Zarbon was in Freezer's room with Freezer, Cooler and Shasha, Shasha was in his normal form again, "Think about your other appearance Zarbon, you can do it!" Shasha said.

"I can't do it! I'll be stuck like this forever!" Zarbon said.

"You can't be stuck in either form! Now transform back!" Shasha said.

"It's okay, take your time Zarbon, relax, and think about your other appearance. You have to think clearly." Cooler said.

"Ok!" Zarbon thought clearly and finally transformed back, "Thank you Cooler!" Zarbon said.

"Anytime Zarbon, anytime," Cooler said.

"Now look at yourself in the mirror!" Freezer said handing Zarbon the mirror.

"I'm normal again." Zarbon said.

"Ok Cooler, Shasha leave!" Freezer said.

"Remember Zarbon, we have tutoring tomorrow." Cooler said he left with Shasha.

"Freezer why is my other form so ugly? It's so unfair! I was just trying to impress Liya, but she ran away and screamed!" Zarbon said frustrated.

"Well duh, I would have done the same thing if I were her!" Freezer said.

"I can't believe it, I'm a fool!" Zarbon got into Freezer's lap and started crying.

"So that little bitch hurt your feelings huh? Well my feelings get hurt easily too! Funny thing is that her room is right next to yours!"

Next day, Zarbon sat in a classroom in the palace. Cooler was his teacher, Zarbon was not paying attention to him, Cooler looked over at Zarbon, "Zarbon is something wrong?" he asked.

"No, yes I need to talk to you." Zarbon said.

"What's wrong, is it the fact that Dodoria was making fun of you yesterday?"

"Yes, and Liya! She called my other form ugly! I'm in love with her, I want her to be my friend and love me!" Zarbon said.

"You shouldn't really care about your other appearance. It's like that old saying, beauty is only skin deep." Cooler said.

"What's that mean?" asked Zarbon sometimes confused by proverbs in general.

"Just because you have two different forms, doesn't make you a monster on the inside. I can really tell that you are beautiful on the inside. Try to stay as beautiful on the inside as long as you can. Your kind can be beautiful and ugly whenever they want to be." Cooler said.

"Dodoria said that I don't have feelings at all." Zarbon said.

"Everyone feels Zarbon, especially your kind when it comes to other species judging them. In public stay in the form that suits you the most, be proud that you are one of the most liked breeds in the universe." Cooler said.

"Do you know where Liya is?" asked Zarbon. The door opened up and Liya stepped into the room with some books.

"There she is, welcome Liya, I hope you like it here. I know it's not like home at all, but oh well." Cooler said.

"Thank you Prince Cooler." Liya said.

"Oh yah I believe you know Zarbon!" Cooler said.

"Hello Liya!" Zarbon said waving at her.

Liya frowned, "I'm so out of here! " She ran out of the room.

"Liya get back here now! Oh gezz, I'll go get her you stay here Zarbon!" Cooler said running out of the room.

"Oh man there she goes again!" Zarbon said as he ran out of the room also.

Liya was in the garden crying, Cooler then stopped her and sat next to her on the bench, "What's wrong?" Cooler asked.

"My mother is dead, I'll never see my father again or my home planet! Now I have some hideous creature that is in love with me!" Liya said crying.

Cooler at least pretended to care, unlike Freezer, "I'm sorry about your parents, but Freezer just thought that Zarbon should have a playmate. Zarbon is not like Freezer at all, he's a good pure-gold hearted person, even though we're trying to make him ruthless. The point is that he was just trying to make you feel welcome. He wants to be your friend." Cooler said.

Cooler all the sudden got mad at her, "And you repay him by hurting his feelings!"

Zarbon ran into the garden, "Yah but he's so hideous! Why would anyone love a creature like that?" asked Liya.

When Zarbon heard this he got mad, "Who are you calling hideous? The only hideous thing I see are your insides!" Zarbon said.

"Zarbon I told you to wait in the classroom!" Cooler said.

"I'm not ugly on the inside!" Zarbon said.

"Get away from me you ugly thing!" Liya said.

Zarbon looked like he was about to kill Liya, that stubborn child bitch, "How dare you call me ugly! That is the most insulting thing you could ever say to me! You have no right to call me ugly!"

"Zarbon calm down!" Cooler said.

"Fine I'll show you ugly!" Zarbon yelled.

Zarbon then transformed into that hideous creature again, "Zarbon settle your ass down right now!" Cooler said.

"I really like you a lot; all I wanted was to be your friend!" Zarbon ran away in tears.

"Well congratulations Liya, you just hurt his feelings, again!" Cooler said.

"I'm in a stressful time Cooler; I need some time to think!" Liya said.

"Oh nice excuse Liya, now go back to class!" Cooler said.

"I hate you, I hate everybody!" She ran away from him into the palace.

Liya ran around the palace, then she ran into Dodoria, "What gives you the right to bump into me wench?" asked Dodoria.

Liya took one look at him and was grossed out from his presence and the smell of him, "Ew, gross! You have no right to bump into me!" she said.

"Maybe you're mouth needs to be washed out with soap!" He laughed.

Liya was not scared of him, she usually stood up to people who pissed her off, "Get lost!" She said.

Dodoria angrily grabbed her arm and squeezed it tightly, "How about I rip your arm off instead!" Dodoria yelled.

"No, let me go, help!" Liya said trying to get free.

Zarbon, who was in his normal form again, saw her trying to get lose from Dodoria, "Let her go!" he yelled.

"Well, well if it isn't beauty and the beast!" Dodoria said would you believe it; ironically, it was from Dodoria that Zarbon referred to himself as beauty and the beast.

"Release her at once! Or else I'll kick your bony butt!" Zarbon said.

"Go on try!" Dodoria said.

"Very well!" Zarbon jumped up into the air and kicked Dodoria in the face.

"Ouch you little brat!" Dodoria yelled letting Liya go.

"Come on let's get out of here!" Zarbon took Liya by the hand and led her away.

They both run into the main thrown room, "That was a close one! Don't ever smart mouth Dodoria ever again, he's mean." Zarbon said.

"You saved me, my hero!" Liya said and she kissed his cheek.

"Oh bollocks madam, now stop you're really making me blush, so are we friends?" Zarbon asked.

"Yes!" Liya said.

"So what do you want to do now?" asked Zarbon.

"Let's go hang out by the pond, friend!" Liya said. They walked out of the palace together holding hands.

End of Story


	6. Chapter 6

_Years without Santa_

Zarbon was in his room watching TV, he was only eight or so, he loved to watch TV from earth, which Freezer forbade to other people on planet Freezer to watch. He was watching Rudolf the Red nosed Reindeer it was the late 1960's, "Wow I want to be like Rudolf, but I already know how to fly." Zarbon said staring at the screen in wonder and eating candy, he was a chubby little thing.

Of course, Zarbon was getting to the age where he should have known by now that things that he saw on TV were not real most of the time, cartoons especially. Then he looked at the screen again and saw what appeared to be an overweight man with a bag of toys, "I wonder who this Santa Claus is, I can't wait to tell Liya about this!" Zarbon said getting up and running to Liya's room.

Liya was sitting on the floor having a tea party with her dolls, which resembled more alien-like than humanoid like to anyone that looked at them, "Would you like to have some tea Mrs. Mushroom?" she said giving the doll some tea.

Zarbon ran into Liya's room, "Liya, Liya guess what?" Zarbon said.

"I'm in the middle of a tea party what do you want?" Liya asked in her very thick sounding British accent.

"There is this big fat man named Santa Claus and he brings toys to kids!" Zarbon said.

"What are you talking about?" Liya asked picking at one of her doll's hair.

"I mean that he's a big fat man and he brings toys to kids!" Zarbon said.

"Let's go meet this fellow, I need another doll!" Liya said.

"Wait a minute we don't even know where he is!" Zarbon said.

"What do you mean you don't know where he is?" Liya asked.

"I saw him on TV, he has a reindeer named Rudolf and he has a red nose that glows a lot!" Zarbon said.

"Zarbon that doesn't help I have no idea what a reindeer even is!" Liya yelled.

"Hold on don't be brash, we just need some more information on them is all, come with me to my room." Zarbon said grabbing her by the hand.

"Can I at least bring my dolls with me?" Liya asked.

Zarbon thought this was so silly, why in the world did that silly girl like her dolls more than him, he did have a crush on her that was for sure, he stared at the TV with Liya while Liya had her dolls situated next to her and him. "Tell Mrs. Mushroom that she's a lovely young lady!" Liya said to Zarbon, Zarbon was not paying attention he was just staring at the screen, "Hello!" Liya yelled.

"Sorry what did you say?" Zarbon asked.

"I said tell Mrs. Mushroom that she's lovely!" Liya said.

Zarbon stared at the doll, "Liya I don't want to sound harsh or anything, but Mrs. Mushroom is just a doll." Zarbon said.

"So what!" Liya yelled.

"Well dolls are inanimate objects, they can't talk and they don't have any feelings at all." Zarbon said.

Liya got so pissed off at Zarbon and whacked him in the face with Mrs. Mushroom, "I hate you!" Liya yelled.

"Damn Liya, that wasn't necessary! Wait I have an idea, maybe Santa can bring her to life!" Zarbon said.

"What? That's crazy, all he does is give away toys!" Liya said.

"Who knows, if he has elves and if he has magic flying reindeers, then he can make Mrs. Mushroom real!" Zarbon said.

"That would be perfect then I can tell her stuff that I can't tell a mere boy like yourself!' Liya said.

Zarbon laughed, "Yah that's right." He said playing along.

They watched all those marathon shows all night long, "Maybe we can steal Frosty's hat so that Mrs. Mushroom can come to life!" Zarbon said.

"That's an even better idea!" Liya said.

"Wait he could be anywhere, we better go to Santa first." Zarbon said.

"Good idea, there could be bad snowmen like Freezer!" Liya said.

Therefore, they went to the library that morning and went to see if there were any books on Santa Clause, "Damn this is so stupid!" Liya said.

"Apple said that it's not nice to curse, let's ask the librarian if there are any library books on Santa Clause." Zarbon said getting up and walking up to the librarian, the librarian was a primal changeling such as Zarbon; his species were infamous for being quite intelligent. "Excuse sir, but we need to know where we can find a book on Santa Clause." Zarbon said.

The librarian looked at the small fat boy and started sweating, he had an ego the size of a pea, but even so, he could get insulted when he did not know a thing, "Uh I'm not sure what you're asking about." He said.

"You know Santa Clause he's fat like me, except he's fatter. He's taller than me and he's a human." Zarbon said.

"I still don't know what you're talking about." The librarian said.

"Uh that does it, I'm out of here, and I know someone that knows more about humans than you do!" Zarbon said.

"Are you looking for a book on the human race by any chance, you know that there are actually two planet earths where the humans both evolved on and…" Liya interrupted.

"We're not interested in learning about humans!" Liya said.

They went to ask Apple about humans, he knew more about species than that librarian did, but even he was stumped, "What's a Santa Clause?" Apple asked.

"He's a human who gives out toys to children and we want to find him so he can bring Liya's doll to life." Zarbon said.

"Oh well how do I put this?" Apple asked.

"Never mind sorry we bothered you; I'll go and ask someone else." Zarbon said walking away with Liya.

"I was just about to tell them that dolls can't come to life! Although I have no idea who this Santa guy is," Apple thought to himself.

Zarbon and Liya ran to Zarbon's trainer, the ruthless Shasha Michliv, from planet Cyrillic, although he was the same species as Zarbon, with his hooked nose and scar going across his face, the kids walked up to him during lunch time, "Hey Shasha we got a question to ask you." Zarbon said.

"What do you want Zarbon, do you want more tips on how to transform?" he asked in his deep thick Russian accent.

"We want to know about Santa Clause." Zarbon said.

"I don't know who this Santa Clause is, is he some kind of demon?" Shasha asked.

"No he's a human!" Zarbon yelled.

"A human, what did Freezer tell you about talking to humans kid! You talk to them then they'll come and colonized this planet!" Shasha said throwing his vodka bottle to the other side of the room.

"Zarbon I'm scared!" Liya yelled, after all she knew what Shasha was capable of, especially after witnessing him murder her mother in cold blood when he kidnapped her on her home planet just to get Zarbon a playmate his own age.

"Don't worry it's just Shasha." Zarbon said.

"I know why they call him Santa Clause!" Dodoria said belching.

"Why?" Zarbon asked naively.

"Because he has claws that's why!" Dodoria said.

"So what when I transform I have claws too!" Zarbon said.

"I have claws as well for scratching my pray!" Liya said.

"Ok because he likes to murder children during the middle of the night!" Dodoria said.

"You mean like you and Shasha murdering people?" Zarbon asked.

"Exactly only a lot worst!" Dodoria said.

"What are we talking here?" Zarbon asked.

"I heard he actually likes to crucifix kids like you!" Shasha said playing along with Dodoria.

"What's that mean?" Liya asked.

"You better show him that picture that you took when you went to planet Earth," Dodoria said.

"I don't have picture on me at the moment!" Shasha said.

"Fine I'll go look for it!" Dodoria said getting up and getting the picture.

"He'll be back in moment!" Shasha said.

"Yah this story is getting pretty boring already." Liya said yawning.

Dodoria came back with a photo album of planet Earth, "This was taken in Turkey during Ottoman Empire regime!" Shasha said turning the page then there was a picture of a child being crucified.

"So what's the point?" Zarbon asked not sure what to make of it.

"This was little Armenian boy who was crucified during World War 1, I was like maybe twelve when I took this." Shasha said.

"How did he get up there?" Liya asked.

"He flew of course." Zarbon said.

"Humans don't fly!" Dodoria yelled.

"So?" Zarbon said.

"So he was nailed up on the cross!" Dodoria said.

Zarbon gulped, "The poor boy," he said.

"Guess who the murder was?" Dodoria asked.

"The Turks?" Liya asked.

"No even worse, Santa Clause!" Dodoria yelled.

The kids ran away screaming from the table, "Damn Dodoria that was good one!" Shasha said high fiving him.

"The funny thing is that I've never been to Turkey, we weren't even born yet." Dodoria said.

"Good thing Freezer had this photo album locked away." Shasha said.

"Wait who's this Santa Clause person?" Dodoria asked then Shasha shrugged his shoulders.

Zarbon and Liya were running down the hallway and they bumped into Kiwi, "Kiwi don't let him get us!" Liya yelled.

"Who?" Kiwi asked.

"Santa Clause!" Zarbon said.

"Who is Santa Clause again?" Kiwi asked.

"Well he's the person that I thought brought kids presents, Liya and I were going to go to him, but we just found out that he likes to crucify kids!" Zarbon said.

"Wait crucify?" Kiwi asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes he likes to put kids up on the cross and hammer nails into the palms of their hands!" Zarbon said.

"Sounds like a fairytale to me." Kiwi said.

"It isn't we saw the picture!" Liya said.'

"What picture?" Kiwi asked.

"The picture of the Armenian boy on the cross!" Zarbon said.

Kiwi started laughing, "Oh you're not talking about that dumb picture the Freezer made me take when we went to Turkey are you?" Kiwi asked.

"Wait you're the one that took the picture?" Zarbon asked.

"Yah I didn't have a choice either, I wanted to get pictures of the temples and mountains but Freezer said we have plenty of mountains on Planet Freezer and…" Zarbon interrupted Kiwi.

"So you're the one that took that picture?" Zarbon asked.

"Yes it was I that took it! That kid was almost as scared of us as he was of dying…" Kiwi said.

"So did Santa kill him like Shasha and Dodoria told us?" Liya asked.

"No it was the Turks!" Kiwi said.

"That's what I said." Liya said.

"But Shasha said it wasn't the Turks that did it." Zarbon said.

"He lies, Dodoria and Shasha always yank my chain every once in a while too." Kiwi said.

"But they said that Santa comes at night and crucifies children like us!" Liya said.

"Santa Clause would never do such a thing; it was taken during the daytime! In fact the only reason why that kid was up there on the cross in the first place was because the Turks wanted to get rid of the Armenians because they were Christians!" Kiwi said annoyed.

"What's a Christian?" Zarbon asked.

"I'll explain it to you when you get older ok? Now let me tell you what Santa is really like." Kiwi said sitting down on the ground. He waited for the two naïve children to sit down too, "Come on sit with me!" He said so they sat down too.

Kiwi thought to himself, "Who the heck is Santa Clause, I guess I'll just have to make some stories up by myself then." He thought to himself.

"Now Santa is a great looking man and…" Before Kiwi could finish Zarbon interrupted.

"Santa is old and fat!" Zarbon said.

"Oh I was talking about when he was younger." Kiwi said.

"Oh!" The kids said.

"Yes and he…I'm him!" Kiwi said.

"You are?" Zarbon asked.

"Wait a minute, how could you be Santa when you aren't a human?" Liya asked.

"Because I dress up like him every once in a while, how else do you think I know who he is?" Kiwi asked.

"What color suit does he wear?" Liya asked.

"I wear all sorts of colors!" Kiwi said.

"No he doesn't he wears two colors in particular!" Zarbon said.

"Ok that's enough!" Kiwi said about to talk away.

"Can you bring my doll to life then?" Liya asked holding Mrs. Mushroom up.

Kiwi looked at the doll, "Well I'm not so sure about that," he said.

"Zarbon said that Santa can bring toys to life!" Liya said.

"Yah and Santa brings toys for us to play with too!" Zarbon said.

"Uh well, I'll think about it, if you're really good then I'll get you some toys ok?" Kiwi asked.

"No we want our toys now!" Zarbon said.

"Yes I want Mrs. Mushroom to come to life too!" Liya said.

"All right I'll go and ask Freezer what to do then!" Kiwi said walking away.

"Could you introduce us to Rudolf the reindeer and Frosty the snowman?" Zarbon asked.

Kiwi was panicking in front of Freezer, "You told them that you were Santa Clause?" Freezer asked.

"Yes I did sir can you ever forgive me?" Kiwi asked.

Freezer stared laughing, "Yah maybe, how bad is the situation?" Freezer asked.

"Well Liya wants me to bring her stupid doll to life, and Zarbon wants me to introduce him to his friends Frosty the snowman and Rudolf the red nosed reindeer." Kiwi said.

"We should just tell him them both the truth then." Freezer said.

"No we can't do that, if we do then there will be hell to pay!" Kiwi said.

"So what?" Freezer asked.

"So there are going to be two broken hearted kids!" Kiwi said.

"They're eight they'll get over it someday!" Freezer said.

"But Freezer they're just little kids, they don't know any better, I can't break their hearts!" Kiwi said.

"Ok fine then, dress up as Santa Clause and maybe they'll shut up!" Freezer said.

"One question where am I supposed to find a red suit?" Kiwi asked.

"I'll sew you one how's that sound?" Freezer asked.

"It sounds great I suppose." Kiwi said.

Next night, Kiwi took the kids aside and set them down in front of his bed, "So why did you bring us in here?" Zarbon asked.

"You're not going to hurt us like Freezer does are you?" Liya asked.

"What do you mean Freezer hurts you?" Zarbon asked suspicious.

"Nothing ok, just shut up!" Liya yelled.

Perhaps Freezer raped her too like he had to Zarbon, and she was just too embarrassed to talk about it, "Fine suit yourself." Zarbon said.

"Ok now I'm going to go and get Santa Clause, Freezer invited him to come and visit you two, and he has a lovely surprise for you guys!" Kiwi all the sudden grabbed Liya's doll.

"Kiwi give me my doll back!" she yelled.

"I need it to work my magic dear heart!" Kiwi yelled as he walked away.

"He took my doll Zarbon!" Liya yelled.

"Just trust him, he won't hurt Mrs. Mushroom, I won't let him!" Zarbon said rolling up his sleeves.

All the sudden a few minutes later, Kiwi came into the room with his Santa Suit on, "Ok boys and girls! Let's give a round of applause for Santa Clause!" Kiwi said.

"You look nothing like Santa; this is a big rip off!" Zarbon said.

"Yah and where's my doll fake Santa! Why aren't you fat?" Liya asked.

"Because Santa wanted to go on a diet, and it worked wonders what can I say?" Kiwi asked.

"Can you make yourself look fat?" Liya asked.

"Just one moment please!" Kiwi then went back outside the room and stuffed as much stuff as he could find into his coat and then went back into the room looking fat, "Ok now I'm here!" Kiwi said.

"Santa is supposed to have a beard too!" Zarbon said.

"I don't grow facial hair Zarbon! Anyways let's get this show on the road; I want to introduce you to Mrs. Mushroom whom I brought to life! Apple where are you?" Kiwi then whispered.

"I'm not coming out I look like an idiot cross dresser!" Apple yelled from behind the towel curtains that Kiwi set up for the children.

"Just come out now before I come over there and beat the living tar out of you!" Kiwi said.

"No!" Apple yelled.

"Just one second she's on her way, right now!" Kiwi then went behind the towel curtains, grabbed Apple, and threw him down to the ground in front of the kids, "Say hello Mrs. Mushroom!" Kiwi said.

"Hello kids." Apple said looking miserable.

"That's not my doll!" Liya yelled angry.

"Yah what's the deal with Apple dressed up as a girl?" Zarbon asked.

"That's not Apple!' Kiwi said.

"Yes it is I'm not stupid!" Zarbon said.

"Ok fine, it's Apple in the costume, but he was the cutest one I could find to play Miss Mushroom!" Kiwi said.

"What next?" Liya asked rolling her eyes.

"I will now introduce you to my elf Herby! Herby get out here!" Kiwi said.

Dodoria walked out with an elf suit on, "Dodoria looks funny!" Liya said laughing, Zarbon laughed too.

"Don't laugh at me little brats!" Dodoria said with an angry look on his face.

"It's not Dodoria!" Kiwi said.

"Ok let's get this show on the road where is Rudolf!" Zarbon asked.

"Ok Rudolf come on out!" Kiwi yelled.

Poor Shasha came out with reindeer antlers on and he looked like he was wearing a red clown nose, "Hey Shasha can you make your nose glow?" Liya asked laughing her butt off.

"No Liya that's not Shasha at all, it's Rudolf, but I thought he would be cutter and cuddlier for some reason! Hey Shasha, I mean Rudolf, can you make your clown nose glow?" Zarbon asked laughing.

"Kiwi I hate you!" Shasha said.

Needless to say that was the only time in Zarbon and Liya's life that Shasha and Dodoria were ever nice to them, other than that they pretty much treated both of them like they were dirt.

"Put on a play for us!" Zarbon yelled.

"Yah I'm waiting, you've already disappointed us enough as it is!" Liya yelled.

"Ok come on guys let's put on a play!" Kiwi yelled.

"But I can't act!" Dodoria said.

"Besides we don't even have lines, I can't even read in English!" Shasha said.

"Let's improvise shall we?" Kiwi yelled.

"Ok that's good enough." Shasha said.

Zarbon and Liya rolled their eyes, Kiwi started walking over to Shasha and Dodoria, "Come on Rudolf and Herby, let's go play with Frosty! Apple go put on your Frosty costume!" Kiwi yelled.

"Right on it!" Apple ran back behind the towels and put on a snowman outfit and came back with a top hat and put it on his head, "Happy birthday!" he yelled.

"It's not even my birthday!" Dodoria yelled.

"No that's what he said in the TV movie." Apple said.

Dodoria smiled and so did Shasha, "Hey Shasha, did you get the crucifixes so that we can crucify the kids?" he asked.

"Why yes Kirby, let's kill those naughty kids!" Shasha yelled.

"No!" Liya and Zarbon yelled.

"No this isn't what is supposed to happen! Stop trying to scare Zarbon and Liya, they're just little kids Shasha and Dodoria!" Apple yelled.

"But Santa Clause really does kill kids and crucify them!" Shasha said.

"No he doesn't!" Kiwi said.

"He does too!" Dodoria yelled.

"Wanna bet?" asked Apple.

All the sudden it was Apple and Kiwi vs. Dodoria and Shasha, they all got into a huge fight in front of the kids. "This play sucks!" Zarbon yelled.

"Yah this was a huge waste of time, why do I get the feeling that Kiwi isn't' actually Santa Clause?" Liya asked.

"Let's go find Santa," Zarbon said grabbing Liya's hand.

They went out into the cold weather, it was winter on Planet Freezer, but luckily most of Freezer's men were mammals, despite Zarbon having another form that appeared reptilian, he was evolved enough to be considered a mammal. They were out in the cold calling Santa's name out, "Santa, where are you?" Liya called out.

"Santa we want to know if you'll bring us presents or crucify us!" Zarbon yelled out.

Hours later, Liya dropped down, and Zarbon was worried, "Liya are you all right?" He asked.

"I'm cold; I want my doll Mrs. Mushroom!" Liya yelled.

"I'm here I'll keep you warm, I'm built for warm and cold weather." Zarbon then wrapped his arms around Liya and cuddled up next to her.

Then he passed out, hours later Zarbon and Liya woke up to find that they were in bed, Kiwi and Apple were by their side, it was time to come clean. "Kiwi how did I end up here?" Zarbon asked.

"You're damn lucky that you two are mammals, otherwise you two could have frozen to death, that's why Freezer doesn't usually have reptilian henchmen, because each time he did, they would all die off during the winter time." Kiwi said.

"Can we see Santa now; we're still looking for him." Zarbon said.

"Yah I want Mrs. Mushroom to come to life." Liya said.

"Yah about that, we actually don't have a clue who Santa is." Apple said.

"What?" Zarbon asked.

"Well Dodoria and Shasha have no clue either, they made up some dumb urban legend just to make you two scared." Apple said.

"Why would they do that?" Liya asked.

"Because Dodoria and Shasha are mean that's why!" Apple said.

"See that goes to show you that you get the wrong advice and information from the wrong people Zarbon!" Liya said.

"We don't want to tell you this, but there is no Santa Clause!" Kiwi said.

"What do you mean there's no Santa?" Zarbon asked.

"Well I told Freezer that I didn't have an idea who Santa was, and he told me that Santa was just made up by a bunch of humans just to make Christmas time more magical." Kiwi said.

"What's Christmas?" Zarbon asked.

"Honestly the truth is perhaps more boring than fiction, it's to honor the birth of some dude named Jesus who claimed to be the son of God, which was so not true!" Kiwi said.

"So what?" Liya asked.

"So, Jesus was a prophet who died on the cross supposedly cleansing humanity of their sins, but the sad truth is that they're no different than that horrible Freezer!" Kiwi said closing his eyes.

"So this Christmas thing is nothing but a big scam, just to honor a big phony named Jesus?" Zarbon asked.

"To put it bluntly yes," Kiwi said.

"What about Rudolf, Frosty and Herby the elf?" Liya asked.

"They're made up too," Kiwi said.

"Oh son of a bitch!" Liya yelled.

"Hey don't get upset, just be lucky that you two aren't Christians, just be lucky that you even have access to earth TV period, because the other men aren't allowed to have access to earth TV." Apple said.

"Nobody else has access to earth TV?" Zarbon asked.

"It's true, Planet Freezer is a regime that makes it so that everyone has no access to the outside world, and the only people that have that access are pretty much Freezer, you and Liya." Apple said.

"Well I can't believe I went out into the cold for no reason at all!" Zarbon said.

"Yah I feel like a moron, I can't believe I thought Santa was real; I saw no program honoring Jesus what-so-ever." Liya said.

"But on a lighter note, Kiwi and I pitched in to buy you two a present each!" Apple said.

"Really?" Zarbon asked.

"Where are they?" Liya asked.

"Here they are!" Kiwi said giving Zarbon and Liya a box each.

They opened their presents up, "Look Zarbon I got a new doll!" Liya yelled.

"Let's see what I got!" Zarbon opened the present up and his eyes grew wide, "Wow it's a, what is it?" Zarbon asked looking at the animal in the box.

"It's a turtle! I thought you could use a new friend!" Apple said.

"Thanks so much Apple! I'm going to name him!" Zarbon held the turtle up, "I shall name you…Filbert!" Zarbon said.

"Great name Zarbon!" Kiwi said.

End of Story


	7. Chapter 7

_From Cyrillic with Love_

Freezer was in the main thrown room with seven-year old Zarbon and Shasha, Zarbon and Shasha were playing chess together. Of course, as if you did not know from one of the other stories that I have written, Shasha had a thick Russian accent, but spoke English fluently.

Zarbon pretty much beat Shasha at a game that he was so good at, "Check mate! " Zarbon said.

Shasha got pissed off and threw the chessboard to the ground, he then yelled, "Как ты играет шахматы как это! Я выграл, ты проиграл! "

Zarbon looked confused, he did not know Russian at all despite being of Cyrillic decent, "Excuse me?" he asked.

"In other words I won you didn't! " Shasha yelled.

Zarbon then looked down at the ground, "I've never been good at games, especially chess. " Zarbon said, that dumb Shasha all he ever did was insult poor little Zarbon when he did not do something right.

"Must you be a sore loser Shasha?" Freezer asked rolling his eyes.

"Well on my planet, I was good chess player!" Shasha said proudly.

Zarbon then smiled, "Wow did you have any girlfriends?" he asked innocently.

"Do I look like type of person that likes girls?" asked Shasha.

"I'm just curious." Zarbon said.

"I don't need wife; I can rape all the sex slaves I want!" The real reason why Shasha was one of Freezer's top henchmen was that, like Dodoria, he had a horrible reputation of being a rapist and feared by anyone who worked for Freezer, except Dodoria who was his only friend.

Zarbon's eyes grew wide, "What does rape mean?" asked Zarbon.

"That is none of your concern." Shasha said with a mean frown on his face.

"How did you get that scar on your face Shasha?" asked Zarbon, yes it was true that even though Zarbon's species was built to be attractive usually, Shasha was almost an exception, because he has a huge scar going across his eyebrow, cheek, and thick lips.

Shasha turned around so that Zarbon might not see his sadness if it was even possible, "My mother used to mistreat me, and people would make fun of me because of it, or just run away and not look at me." He said.

"I wouldn't make fun of you." Zarbon said, poor little Zarbon he was sweet but so naïve at the same time.

"You really are sweet kid, that's what I hate about you." Shasha said.

"I'm sure you'll find a person who cares about you, and you'll fall in love and have children who will carry on your last name!" Zarbon said smiling with his head in the clouds.

Shasha started to laugh, "I already told you, nobody can understand me, I'm too complicated. I must go now!" He started to leave then Zarbon started following him. Shasha turned around and Zarbon looked suspicious, then Shasha started walking away again. Zarbon continued to follow him, and then Shasha turned around and saw that Zarbon stood right behind him. This pissed Shasha off almost as much as being beaten at chess, "Why do you always follow me?" he yelled.

"Because I look up to you! You're really cool!" Zarbon said, after all Zarbon so far lived a sheltered life, Shasha was the only primal changeling that Zarbon had ever been mostly around since when his mother. Poor Zarbon did not remember his father, who divorced his mom after he cheated on her, and then not long after that Zarbon's mom abandoned him giving him to Freezer to adopt when he was only three.

"No I'm not; you don't know what kind of person I am." Shasha said.

Freezer then sighed, "I say you need to spend more time with him Zarbon, get to know him a little more. " Freezer said.

"What language do you speak again?" asked Zarbon.

Shasha smiled, "Russian, or dialect called Cyrillic, it's also language system." He proudly said.

"Show me." Zarbon said.

"Ok fine." Shasha then got a piece of paper and wrote in the Russian language, with Cyrillic alphabet. "It says, "I love you darling"." He said.

Zarbon noticed something that he never noticed before, "Why do you write with your left hand, and why does Kiwi too?" asked Zarbon.

Freezer got annoyed and embarrassed with Zarbon's curiosity, "Zarbon dear, Mr. Shasha here is left-handed." He said trying to hold the urged to smack Zarbon in the face.

Zarbon then smiled, "I can right with my right hand." He gladly said.

Freezer once again got mad, "Yes you are right-handed, if I'm not mistaking your mother was left-handed Zarbon. When Kiwi and she met for the first time, they shook hands with their left hands. When that happened, they realized that they were both left-handed." Freezer said.

"Was your mother left-handed too Shasha?" asked Zarbon.

Shasha then crossed his arms, "Why is that important Zarbon?"

Freezer decided to handle that annoying little brat in the best way he knew how, "Ok enough let's switch to a different subject, Shasha I want my adopted son to tour the galaxy, so remember take him to your planet. " Freezer said.

Shasha's eyes grew wide, "He doesn't speak Russian, and he'll never make it! I'm wanted man! "

"Do it or else!" Freezer yelled, after all he needed to be away from that hyperactive little primal changeling.

Shasha gulped, "Ok fine, we're going to my home planet kid, so pick something warm." Shasha said.

Zarbon jumped into the air "Hoary!" he yelled then he hugged Shasha.

The pod landed on planet Cyrillic, they both stepped out of the space pod, the planet was dark and covered in snow, it started snowing and they could see minaret churches, although they were used as homes, after all Shasha's planet was home to atheists not Jews, Christens or any other earth religion. Zarbon and Shasha had winter coats on, whereas Shasha had an ushanka on, a type of Russian hat.

Zarbon was in a coat with fur on the inside of his hood, "This is one weird planet." Zarbon said, after all it rarely snowed on Planet Freezer, but maybe once in a full moon.

Shasha then snapped, "Quiet don't speak English or Japanese they'll think you're spy." He said.

"Ok sorry." Zarbon said.

"Let's go get drink, come on kid I'll bet you're thirsty. Just stay with me and you'll be all right." Shasha said they walk into a bar.

Scene 3

People in the bar were dancing around, drinking vodka, and acting stupid. Then Zarbon walked up a bunch of portraits they were of Karl Marx, Lenin and Stalin.

Zarbon thought they were odd looking, probably because he had never seen a human before, "What a bunch of ugly looking aliens! That one has a big nose, that one looks like he's squinting too much, and that one….." Before Zarbon could finish talking, Shasha interrupted him.

"They're humans, the Soviets expanded their empire onto my planet all those years ago, and we have no choice but to obey them." He said smiling.

"Well that's got to suck! I want a coke!" Zarbon said.

"I'll get you one squirt!" Shasha said about to walk up to the bar.

Before Shasha could order, Zarbon went up to the bar, "I'll take a coke!" He yelled.

Shasha blushed, "You idiot!" He said.

Zarbon then smiled, "Thank you for reminding me about my manners Shasha. May I please have a coke?" he asked the bar tender did not understand a word he said. Zarbon got concerned, "What's wrong are you deaf?" He asked.

"He doesn't understand you because you can't speak Cyrillic." Shasha said.

"I can't get why, but I thought you spoke Russian." Zarbon said.

"Never mind I'll order for you!" Shasha started speaking Russian, "_Excuse me sir, my son here is so thirsty I was wondering if you have coke products, also a nice bottle of vodka." _

The bartender spoke in Russian too, "_We do have coke products, I'll give the little guy a coke, and what type of vodka?"_

"_The regular type, oh wait the orange flavored!_ " Shasha said. The tender gave them the drinks, "Next time Zarbon let me do talking." Shasha said.

"Ok Shasha this is good coke." Zarbon said drinking it, and then he saw a pretty older girl, "Why don't you go dance with that girl over there in the corner." Zarbon said pointing to her.

"No I'm not interested in her. " Shasha said looking at the woman, "Oh no it's her!" he said.

"Who?" asked Zarbon.

"Mishena Lishivica. She used to pick on me in school she made fun of me for my scars. She followed me home every day and jumped me, once she gave me the biggest wedgie I've ever seen." Shasha said.

"Wow maybe she's changed." Zarbon said.

Shasha smiled evilly, "She looks good enough to rape."

"No! Just go and talk to her." Zarbon said.

"Let's go talk to her!" Shasha said taking Zarbon by the hand and leading him over to the woman.

Shasha started speaking Russian again, "_Hello Mishena, remember me?"_

Mishena then looked at Shasha, "Oh_ I remember you all right, you're Shasha Michliv! " _She said.

"I_ want to introduce you to my son, Zarbon Michliv." _Shasha lied.

"_Really? Does he speak Russian?" _ Mishena asked.

Shasha then smiled, "_Of course he does, he's just shy is all."_

Mishena gave Shasha a strange look, "You_ really expect me to believe that? Are you sure he's not adopted?" _she asked.

"_Yes he's adopted, he just can't speak our language well, and I speak to him in English." _Shasha said.

"I_ heard you're most wanted for brutally raping your mother and killing her cold-bloodily. You should be ashamed of yourself. " _Mishena said.

"_So what nobody cares, this planet is full of crime." _Shasha said.

" _I do, I hate this planet, you shouldn't raise your son here." _She said.

"I'll_ admit I had sort of a crush on you when we were kids." _Shasha said.

"_I sort of had a thing for you too!" _Mishena said.

Even though Zarbon could not understand them, he knew what was going on, "Oh I see where this is heading." He said thinking that they were going to start making out, as he had seen Shasha do with a sex slave in the hallway on break.

Shasha ignored him, "_So do you want to rent a room and have sex?" _Shasha asked.

"_Sure I'm not married, and I love bad boys!" _Mishena said.

Shasha looked at Zarbon, "She wants to have sex with me, should I just get it over with without force of sexual intercourse?" asked Shasha.

"Excuse me?" asked Zarbon who was far too young to know what sex even was perhaps or maybe he did not want to talk about it.

"You know, not force sex on her!" Shasha said uncomfortably.

"Yah, whatever that means, either way I'm so horribly confused." Zarbon said.

Shasha turned to Mishena, "_Why don't we check into a hotel room? My son here can guard the door from any intruders." _Shasha said.

"_Are you sure about that, you are a wanted man. There are Bolsheviks on the planet, and I'm pretty sure you're a Menshevik." _Mishena said.

"_So what, I say we do it before they get here!" _Shasha said.

Mishena smiled, "Ok_ that's fine with me." _She said.

They both check into a hotel room, and Zarbon guarded the door while Shasha and his friend are having themselves a time.

Poor little Zarbon was board, "Shasha can I go now? I'm going to get myself another drink." Zarbon left, but saw a water fountain, he bent over to drink from it, "Ok maybe I'm not so thirsty after all." He said the water was horrible.

Zarbon saw some Bolsheviks coming down the hallway with guns, "Oh great I wonder if those are Bolsheviks. Oh no they are!" Zarbon said he then went in front of the door. "Excuse me gentlemen, but what are you doing here?_" _asked Zarbon.

One of the Bolsheviks smiled, "So you speak English hum? We're looking for this man, he was spotted on this planet about hour ago and lose talk led us here to him." He said showing a picture of Shasha.

Poor little Zarbon so frightened that he panicked and rated on Shasha, "He's in there!"

Bolshevik 1 said "Thank you comrade!" then spoke Russian to the other Bolshevik, "_Let's break it down! _

Bolshevik 2 nodded his head, "_I'm with you pal!" _They both break down the door and grab Shasha.

Shasha then said, "_I guess I'll see you around! "_

Mishena watched at the Bolsheviks took Shasha to prison, "_Goodbye Shasha, for I shall not know when we will meet again!"_

Bolshevik two gave Zarbon a book in Russian, "Here is book on Karl Marx, educate yourself." He said.

Zarbon looked at the front cover of the book, and just stared at it, "This is crap! I can't read it!" He threw the book down. He then yelled, "I'm coming to rescue you Shasha!"

In prison, Shasha was bored and sitting in his cell, he yelled in Russian, "_You pigs will have to release me sometime!"_

"Shasha!" It was Zarbon, how did he get here? Either way he was looking through the bars leading into the prison.

"Zarbon, it's you, what are you doing here?" asked Shasha.

"I'm here to rescue you!" Zarbon said.

"No I want to die!" Shasha said.

"No I can't let you! I look up to you! I'll never get to play chess with you ever again!" Zarbon said.

Shasha then thought and said, "Wait you still owe me chess game from the fact that I took you here with me!"

"Come on I'll get you out of here!" Zarbon said.

"Never mind I can break out of here!" Shasha said breaking through the wall by throwing a fireball into it.

Zarbon then said, "Come on let's get out of here!"

"Well come on we'll find the space pod!" Shasha said they both ran away.

There was a snowstorm outside and they were both cold.

Shasha said, "I'm so cold Zarbon, I say we start hunting animals!"

"Why?" asked Zarbon.

Shasha then said, "Because we'll be warmed by their fur!"

"Well ok chap!" Zarbon saw a squirrel, "Hello what's this?" he asked.

Shasha looked at the animal, "It's a dumb squirrel." Shasha said.

"Let's kill it for its fur!" Zarbon said trying to go after it, but then Shasha picked him up.

"No its not big enough animal, it needs to be elk or deer." Shasha said.

"I'm hungry Shasha!" Zarbon said, he looked and saw a lake as the snowstorm cleared up, "Wow a lake!" he yelled.

"So what?" yelled Shasha with his arms crossed.

"Let's fish for fish!" Zarbon said.

"Do you have fishing pole with you?" Shasha asked.

"Oh don't tell me you forgot the fishing poles!" Zarbon said.

Shasha glared at Zarbon, "I'll jump in instead!" Therefore, he jumped in and caught a fish in his mouth, and jumped out of the lake.

Shasha got mad, "Get that out of your mouth!" he said.

Zarbon spit it out of his mouth, "Its cold in there! Let's cook it!"

"All right, get some firewood!" Shasha said.

Zarbon went searching for firewood, and then he saw a shark fin in the lake, "It's a huge one I'm going to fish it out!" Zarbon then went in, grabbed the big fish by the tail, and threw it onto land.

Shasha was amazed at how strong the small fry was, "Now that's what I call a kill! Zarbon this is no ordinary fish!"

"What is it?" Zarbon asked getting out of the water.

"It's a shark, a big one too!" Shasha said.

"Do you have any crocodiles?" asked Zarbon.

"It's too cold for crocodiles!" Shasha said.

Zarbon sighed, "Darn I like to eat crocodiles more than sharks." He said.

Later on, the two stopped eating the shark and were now sleeping next to the campfire. Zarbon was snoring, well actually, they both snored, so Zarbon was having some nightmare and started kicking Shasha's face in his sleep.

Shasha woke up, "Zarbon! Will you quit kicking my face?" he asked.

"What mother, what was that!" asked Zarbon, another anxiety dream?

"I'm not your mother!" then Shasha heard a bird sound, "Listen!"

"What!" Zarbon said.

Shasha grabbed Zarbon and covered his mouth, "Shut up, listen!" Shasha said.

Zarbon heard the noise too, "Where is that noise coming from?" he asked.

"Follow me." Shasha said, they both tiptoed over to the noise, behind a bush, was a beautiful blond woman who looked white, but was in the full nude. However, she had red, yellow, pink, and orange feathers on her back. Shasha was shocked, "Wow who is that?" he asked.

Zarbon smiled, "Do you like her?" he asked.

"Of course I don't, she's one of those Earth humans, at least I think she is." Shasha said confused.

"What's a human again?" asked Zarbon.

"One of the weakest races in universe, our species shares about 50% of their DNA." Shasha said.

"Are we really the same species as humans?" asked Zarbon.

"Not really, I'm not sure what we are." Shasha said.

"Could we mate with humans?" asked Zarbon.

Shasha said, "It depends on how closely related our genes are."

"Do you think I'll marry one?" asked Zarbon

"Why do I care? I suppose you could even though you'd be total outcast on Earth." Shasha said, and they saw the woman crumble to ashes and dust, but then raise from her ashes and transforming into a firebird creature, "Wow that's no human at all! It's firebird!" Shasha said.

"You mean one of those phoenix?" asked Zarbon.

"Same thing, all this time I thought it was just legend." Shasha said.

"Shall we catch it?" asked Zarbon.

Shasha eyes grew wide, "No you don't eat firebirds!"

Zarbon took a camera out, "I'll take a picture, I bought a camera in the gift shop!" He said.

"Zarbon no!" Shasha said. (Zarbon took a picture of the phoenix and it went wild and panicked. Shasha then said, "Let's run before we're flames!" They started running, and then they bumped into the Bolsheviks.

"Uh oh!" Zarbon said.

Bolshevik 1 smiled, "Well, well where have we've been off to? You're going back to jail punk, and we're taking your child with you!" All the sudden the firebird ran into the Bolsheviks and they were on fire, they ran into river and they jumped in, they were all wet. "_Let's go dry off now!" _Bolshevik one said.

Bolshevik two spoke "_I'm with you on that one buddy!" _They both ran away.

Shasha then laughed, "Zarbon I never thought I would say this, but for once your stupidity saved our skins!" he said.

Zarbon then said, "Thank you Shasha, say where's the phoenix?" The firebird was still running around all crazy, but then a tragic thing happened, it ran into the river and the flames went out. It also drowned.

"Poor thing, I'll go save it!" Zarbon then jumped into the river, got the corps of the phoenix and put it back on dry, well snowy land.

Shasha then sighed, "Its dead Zarbon!"

"I have healing powers." Zarbon then put his hands onto the bird and started to heal it and all the sudden the phoenix turned to ashes and dust, and then roused and formed into a woman with feathers again, "Wow this is beyond belief!" Zarbon said shock.

Shasha stared at the creature with wonder, "A phoenix rises from its ashes and dust and is born again!"

The Phoenix looked at Zarbon, "Thank you small boy, if it weren't for you I would have perished into the sea."

"I'm sorry I took your picture I just wanted to show Freezer." Zarbon said.

"It's no problem, since you saved my life, I'll give you one wish." The Phoenix said.

"Can you kiss me?" asked Zarbon puckering his lips up.

"Choose your wish wisely or you will die!" the Phoenix said.

"Excuse me?" asked Zarbon.

Phoenix looked at him unpleased, "In other words, I don't want to kiss you, just wish for something else!" She said.

Zarbon blushed, "That wasn't a wish that was a request! Ok I wish we could find our space pod so we can get off this weird planet!" he said.

"Done!" The Phoenix said. All the sudden the space pod appeared out of nowhere, "Goodbye and thank you small boy!" She then transformed into her bird form and flew away.

"Goodbye and thank you for the wish! Let's go to the space pod Shasha!" Zarbon said pointing to the space pod and walking towards it.

"Yes let's go," Shasha said they both got into the space pod and the space pod took off the planet and went back to Planet Freezer.

Back on Planet Freezer hours later, Zarbon showed Freezer the picture of the phoenix. "Well Zarbon, I guess you can take good pictures." Freezer said.

Zarbon then sneezed, "I have a cold Freezer!"

"Get into bed and I'll have some hot soup for you in no time!" Freezer said.

"Ok." Zarbon sneezed again.

Shasha then sneezed, "Freezer I think I caught Zarbon's cold!"

"Shasha go into Zarbon's room and get into bed with him!" Freezer said.

"Oh man!" Shasha said Zarbon annoyed him enough why did he have to be in bed with him?

In Zarbon's room, Zarbon and Shasha were in the bed sneezing like crazy. Kiwi brought them some soup full of crocodile claws.

Zarbon smiled, "Thank you Kiwi!"

"Your welcome Zarbon did you have fun on the planet?" Kiwi asked.

"No not really, Shasha got it on with a girl he knew back in school." Zarbon said.

Kiwi looked funny at Zarbon, "Ok I didn't need to know that."

"That was supposed to be between you and me!" Shasha said wanting to strangle Zarbon.

Zarbon blushed, "Sorry I guess I should keep my mouth shut from now on!"

"Oh before I forget Zarbon, here's a book on Latin that Freezer wanted you to read. After all you are studying two languages, French and Latin." Kiwi said taking a book out of his bag.

"Oh no not another language book, but at the same time be happy too!" Zarbon grabbed the book and started reading it.

"What normal person would look forward to homework?" Shasha asked.

Zarbon smiled, "I love learning Shasha! I want to be smart just like Freezer and Cooler."

Shasha rolled his eyes, "Бога матери, sometimes I just don't understand you Zarbon." He said.

End of Story


End file.
